All Apologies (Boombox Demo version)

I feel that the reason they put this at the end of With the Lights Out (in obvious chronological order, with this being mid-1991 and the last three being early 1994), is because "You Know You're Right" and "Do Re Mi" are extremely depressing, and they wanted to leave the listener on a more hopeful note. Thus, they put this pretty song at the end. At least, that's what I think.

yeah I like this song! yeah ! made me think that girls are really sometimes selfish thinking about themselves. even though she knows that it cost too much pain. most beautiful girls are really proud of themselves and the moment they met a guy whose handsome than they're so called boyfriends they can't avoid flirting with them. maybe that's the way how reality works. I don't know about relationships but I had an experience about this thing. but I'm not generalizing that all girls are like this. maybe because of what they see in the movies these days. maybe because of the trend these days. which makes the generation embrace polygamy. talking about screaming infidelities. and I hate those girls who thinks they're really damn pretty and thinks that they should look for a guy whose just handsome and if not rich but what about us ? nice guys !!! not so cute but nice and sensible whose ready to defend them whose ready to sacrifice everything in the name of love! whose going to be there every time she needs some help whose not gonna turn a back from her. yeah! that's why I don't believe in love anymore. even though I'm a member of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints I still don't believe in true love anymore . I guess that true love are for all of those people whose rich and famous whose handsome and not ugly like me. even though I have a job girls seems not satisfied if your diligent what they want is a guy who has a high status whose a professional . fetch! rock n roll all of this all of what we have in this world is just temporary we cannot bring this into our grave. life is so short I'm already 26 and I want to die at 27 like Kurt Cobain yeah you know your right I'm a loser! but who cares I ain't seen my dad I came from a broken family . and my job is just to teach Koreans how to speak English on-line and no matter what I do no one appreciates that I need to support my mom cause she's already 56 and I never had a chance to go into college cause it's either I had to choose between going to school without any food in your stomach or just have to look for a job to pay for the bills and earn for a living. I had a girlfriend whom I lost because she said that she found someone whose better way far better than me since she can't see me anymore cause she's now leaving in the states and I'm still here in hell (Philippines) she choose to go with that guy despite of my love for her. I don't even understand why she just left me for that guy. and why do girls now a days choose a guy whom they just think he's cute and he's got a class. so why not? fetch the world is so ugly.!!! can't control my self I'm sorry. -peace out- rock music rules- grunge,metal, death, gothic,black,heavy,hairmetal,glam,numetal. as long as it's rock cool -amen-

yeah I like this song! yeah ! made me think that girls are really sometimes selfish thinking about themselves. even though she knows that it cost too much pain. most beautiful girls are really proud of themselves and the moment they met a guy whose handsome than they're so called boyfriends they can't avoid flirting with them. maybe that's the way how reality works. I don't know about relationships but I had an experience about this thing. but I'm not generalizing that all girls are like this. maybe because of what they see in the movies these days. maybe because of the trend these days. which makes the generation embrace polygamy. talking about screaming infidelities. and I hate those girls who thinks they're really damn pretty and thinks that they should look for a guy whose just handsome and if not rich but what about us ? nice guys !!! not so cute but nice and sensible whose ready to defend them whose ready to sacrifice everything in the name of love! whose going to be there every time she needs some help whose not gonna turn a back from her. yeah! that's why I don't believe in love anymore. even though I'm a member of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints I still don't believe in true love anymore . I guess that true love are for all of those people whose rich and famous whose handsome and not ugly like me. even though I have a job girls seems not satisfied if your diligent what they want is a guy who has a high status whose a professional . fetch! rock n roll all of this all of what we have in this world is just temporary we cannot bring this into our grave. life is so short I'm already 26 and I want to die at 27 like Kurt Cobain yeah you know your right I'm a loser! but who cares I ain't seen my dad I came from a broken family . and my job is just to teach Koreans how to speak English on-line and no matter what I do no one appreciates that I need to support my mom cause she's already 56 and I never had a chance to go into college cause it's either I had to choose between going to school without any food in your stomach or just have to look for a job to pay for the bills and earn for a living. I had a girlfriend whom I lost because she said that she found someone whose better way far better than me since she can't see me anymore cause she's now leaving in the states and I'm still here in hell (Philippines) she choose to go with that guy despite of my love for her. I don't even understand why she just left me for that guy. and why do girls now a days choose a guy whom they just think he's cute and he's got a class. so why not? fetch the world is so ugly.!!! can't control my self I'm sorry. -peace out- rock music rules- grunge,metal, death, gothic,black,heavy,hairmetal,glam,numetal. as long as it's rock cool -amen-

80srockerchick, first off, chill. seriously. No one likes people who who scream all the time. Second, why would anyone write down that they were quitting the music business on a note like that if they expected to actually do it? Who did he intend to read it? Perhaps it was assisted suicide, but not murder.

yeah the song is awesome and its pretty sad he died but i dont think we should try to find out what the song meant to him but instead fine our own meaning to it.

WOW THATS CHEESEY! XD

Everyone comes so close to getting this song, but are off by just a bit. Firstly, yes, this is akin to a suicide note. It's position at the end of In Utero is no accident, it's Kurt's final message to the world

"What else should I be All apologies"

Most get this, this is like, what else can I be? To put it in today's terms, should I be like Pearl Jam and just make forgettable records a decade after anyone cares about them anymore, or be like U2 and criss cross between techno and saving the world?

"What else should I say Everyone is gay"

Many times Kurt wrote in an abstract and intuitive way. And other times, he was blatantly direct. This is one of those times. This line has nothing to do with being happy or whatever bullshit people are telling themselves. It means exactly what you all deep down know it means. Everyone has homoerotic feelings. Everyone. Get over it. So what else do you cretins want me to say? How about this!

"What else could I write I don't have the right"

He mentioned in his suicide note that he didn't have the right to write music if he no longer felt the passion anymore.

"What else should I be All apologies

In the sun In the sun I feel as one In the sun In the sun I'm married buried"

Most people get this. The sun is the equivalent of being dead, and feel as one is being free. Married and buried? Maybe that's what comes to us all? Or maybe that's what makes you feel as one? Or perhaps both. Nirvana lyrics frequently had double meanings

"I wish I was like you Easily amused Find my nest of salt"

He wishes he could be like most people, and be happy with their TV's and beer and strip clubs. Or be like most celebrities, and be happy with the money, fame, drugs, and whores. He can't

"Everything is my fault I'll take all the blame"

Again, this is very direct, and means exactly what it seems. No one is responsible for Kurt's suicide besides Kurt, and no one should feel responsible. This seems like it could be sarcastic, but it's not. Sarcasm generally doesn't litter suicide notes, sincerity does (as well as self-loathing)

"Aqua seafoam shame Sunburn with freezerburn Choking on the ashes of her enemy"

This is a little tougher, as it's very much on the abstract side. "Aqua seafoam shame" would seem to indicate shame that goes out to the ocean like ashes. "Sunburn with freezerburn" seems to indicate something akin to a double edge sword, or between a rock and a hard place. You get burned both ways. Maybe that's how he viewed being a famous band versus being an underground band? And "choking on the ashes of her enemy" would seem to go in line with "aqua seafoam shame," meaning the ashes of the enemy of mother nature will go out to be part of it. It's a self-loathing view. It has nothing to do with Courtney Love.

"All alone is all we are (x14)"

I changed it to what it really says. "All in all is all we are" means absolutely nothing. "All alone is all we are" means exactly what it says. We're all alone in this world. He says it very clearly, especially at the last line when the instruments go off. Listen closely to Kurt's final message to the world if you want to know what All Apologies says

THIS DOESN'T HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE SONG BUT I NEED THIS TO BE HEARD...!!!!!!!!I DON'T BELIEVE KURT KILLED HIMSELF!!!!!!!! I THINK IT WAS A MURDER OR A HELPED SUICIDE. CONSIDERING THE FACT THE FIRST LINES OF HIS SUICIDE NOTE WERE ONLY SAYINGHE WAS GOING TO QUIT THE MUSIC BUSINESS. ONLY THE LAST FEW SENTENCES WERE SAYING HE WAS GOING TO KILL HIMSELF AND THOSE FEW SENTENCES WERE NOT IN HIS HAND-WRITING!!!!!! DON'T YOU THINK THAT IS A GOOD INDICATION THAT IT WAS MURDER!!!! SO THAT IS WHAT I BELIEVE IF YOU HAVE ANY COMMENTS ON THAT JUST SAY IT BECAUSE I WOULD LIKE TO HEAR WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY!!!!!!!!