All Your Jeans Were Too Tight

Everything I say sounds clumsy and dumb
Trying to make you feel better
Is like trying to trick St. Peter
Tuesdays and Thursdays I remember
The Stud's well drink special
A well cheap as the tide
Like that one that swallowed you up
Yeah, you could really get fucked up
You were not wrong
To give me all your clothes
You were not wrong
I looked like a fool
You were not wrong
To give everything away
I put my flowers in your window
To hide a world nobody would ever prize
And all of this vanity would be funny
If it didn't hurt so much

You were not wrong
All you and I had to throw away
You were not wrong
Was a cowardly pile of sheets
You were not wrong
And a heartbeat that couldn't carry you
You were not wrong
To want something better
The sweet screwdrivers were like TNT
And he said, "Your agony
Is such an obvious barge to tow."
That not even a mother could drop
And you took his advice, he said,
"Drop your disappointment
Like you drop a grand piano."
You were not wrong
To give me all your clothes
You were not wrong
But all your jeans were too tight
You were not wrong
And why did you paint your bathroom black
You were not wrong
I can understand liking Barbara Streisand
You were not wrong
But I'm not sure about the soundtrack from Diva
You were not wrong
And what was up with the tanning salon
You were not wrong
I'm sorry I said anything about the tattoo
You were not wrong
But did you really need another earring
You were not wrong
And I hope that you know that I really loved you
You were not wrong
And we had a good time, didn't we?