Well, in my opinion this song is about being a young & maybe a little naive &/or introverted girl and finding yourself loving a man who is at first very charming, carefree & outgoing, and seems at first to be without limits, as in
"There was a time
you opened up every doorway
you didn't mind if everything
wasn't your way"
then that man starts to gradually become more introverted & shows their more possessive/obsessive side to you as the relationship progresses, even while they keep up the appearance of being carefree & outgoing to everyone else,
"Don't pull away
that goes against what you told me
I look in your eyes
I realize what you've sold me
is love in a vacuum"
so you confront them about the way they're acting and of course they deny it,
"I think you've changed
but you insist that
that's not true"
quite possibly they are an addict of some sort, my guess would be cocaine, &/or showing very obsessive behavior towards you (early on in the video for this song we see the man hanging a picture up, it is a very large portrait of Aimee & it is prominently displayed in his/their apartment for the duration of the song), thus their "love in a vacuum",
"You look so strange, so distant
that you're hardly you
Now I can see
how you have been acting different
You say it's me
but I know
that it isn't
it's love in a vacuum"
but still you are in love with them and don't want to leave them and you know that they are truly in love with you and they don't want you to leave them either, maybe they are convinced you can save them from themself, maybe they are so broken that the possibility of an overdose &/or suicide attempt is very real and you want to get through to them that their behavior not only dangerous but it is also just pissing you off and if they don't wise up they run the risk of loosing you, as in the lines
"You will be lonely
if you leave me alone", so you want to save them but can't get through to them due to the addiction &/or emotional problems they have,
"Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
love in a vacuum
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
You will be lonely
if you leave me alone
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough"
you want them to understand that the love they are giving you is not enough when it is filtered through the vacuum of their drug addiction &/or emotional impairment,
"You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough
and just wait
you will be lonely
Love in a vacuum
Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
Love in a vacuum".
'Love In A Vacuum' for me is a hauntingly truthful acute argument on the loneliness of obsession and almost inevitable loss of love that follows people who are broken in some way or another; the obsessives, the coke heads, the drunks, addicts or the just-plain-old emotionally broken; a razor sharp, lyrically driven, deceptively poppy, yet ultimately-depressing-in-the-best-way song.
Quintessential Aimee Mann.
For 20 years I've held this pulpit.
Preached the word, served the Eucharist,
Gained the trust of the townsfolk.
Made every football game, never missed a social.
Last week, a boy I taught theology
Came back in town with a new ideology,
And now those feelings-- I tucked away
Threaten this sanctuary.
A lifetime of burning culminated in one innocent, forbidden touch.
I know this is wrong because I'm told this is wrong.
A new recruit, twenty-five years old.
He joined the habit with a chip on his shoulder.
Some nights he'd proclaim his preference
But only flat back drunk on a bottle of Jameson.
One of those nights we stayed up, the two of us.
Singing our lives, just the two of us.
We were hiding in the dark,
I fell asleep by his side.
We woke to the chimes of the bells in the steeple and ran off to separate rooms.
They can't know what we've done,
Or our whole world would come undone.
You'll never live this down,
You'll never live this down,
You'll never live this down,
(They're gonna find you out!),
You'll never live this down,
(And when they find you out!),
You'll never live this down,
(They're gonna drag you out! Don't let them find you!).
I know this is wrong, because we're told this is wrong.
Preached the word, served the Eucharist,
Gained the trust of the townsfolk.
Made every football game, never missed a social.
Last week, a boy I taught theology
Came back in town with a new ideology,
And now those feelings-- I tucked away
Threaten this sanctuary.
A lifetime of burning culminated in one innocent, forbidden touch.
I know this is wrong because I'm told this is wrong.
A new recruit, twenty-five years old.
He joined the habit with a chip on his shoulder.
Some nights he'd proclaim his preference
But only flat back drunk on a bottle of Jameson.
One of those nights we stayed up, the two of us.
Singing our lives, just the two of us.
We were hiding in the dark,
I fell asleep by his side.
We woke to the chimes of the bells in the steeple and ran off to separate rooms.
They can't know what we've done,
Or our whole world would come undone.
You'll never live this down,
You'll never live this down,
You'll never live this down,
(They're gonna find you out!),
You'll never live this down,
(And when they find you out!),
You'll never live this down,
(They're gonna drag you out! Don't let them find you!).
I know this is wrong, because we're told this is wrong.
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Like a lot of the other comments are saying, I think this mainly about voyeurism. If the song was about his girlfriend, then why would he use the word spy. If you are a spy it means you shouldn't be caught, that is kind of the whole point, and if you are a voyeur, the whole point of the pleasure you get from it, is the fact that the other people don't know you are watching them. See a bit of a connection there?
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The way this song speaks to me🥺🥺when I sing it I feel like I relate
this is how i hear it... only slight changes, makes a bit more sense though.
For 20 years I’ve held this pulpit Preached the word, served the Eucharist Gained the trust of the townsfolk Made every football game Never missed a social Last week a boy I taught theology Came back into town with a new ideology Those feelings I tucked away Threading the sanctuary A lifetime of burning culminated In one innocent forbidden touch I know this is wrong, cause I’m told this is wrong A new recruit, 25 years old He joined the habit with a chip on his shoulder Some nights he’d proclaim his preference But only flat back drunk on a bottle of Jameson When all those nights, we stayed up, the two of us Singing our lives, just the two of us We were hiding in the dark, I fell asleep by his side We woke to the chimes and the bells of the steeple and ran of to supper at once They cant know what we’ve done, our whole world would come undone You’ll never live this down (repeated) They’re gonna find you out And when they find you out They’re gonna drag you out Don’t let them find you I know this is wrong, cause we’re told this is wrong A lifetime of burning culminate anymore In one innocent forbidden touch I know this is wrong, cause we’re told this is wrong