This is one of my favorite songs. https://fnfgo.io
Got out of prison back in '86 and I found me a wife
Walked the clean and narrow
Just tryin' to stay out and stay alive
Got a job at the rendering factory,it ain't gonna make me rich
In the darkness before dinner comes
Sometimes I can feel the it
I got a cold mind to go tripping across that thin line
I'm sick of doin straight time
My uncles at the evenin' table makes his living runnin' hot cars
Slips me a hundred dollar bill, says
"Charlie, you best remember who your friend are."
I got a cold mind to go tripping across that thin line
I ain't makin' straight time
Eight years in, it feels like you're gonna die
But you get used to anything
Sooner or later it becomes your life
Kitchen floor in the evening, tossin' my little babies high
Mary's smilin', but she watches me out of the corner of her eye
Seems you can't get any more than half free
I step out onto the front porch, and suck the cold air deep inside of me
Got a cold mind to go tripping cross that thin line
I'm sick of doin' straight time
In the basement, huntin' gun and a hacksaw
Sip a beer, and thirteen inches of barrel drop to the floor
Come home in the evening, can't get the smell from my hands
Lay my head down on the pillow
And, go driftin' off into foreign lands
Walked the clean and narrow
Just tryin' to stay out and stay alive
Got a job at the rendering factory,it ain't gonna make me rich
In the darkness before dinner comes
Sometimes I can feel the it
I got a cold mind to go tripping across that thin line
I'm sick of doin straight time
My uncles at the evenin' table makes his living runnin' hot cars
Slips me a hundred dollar bill, says
"Charlie, you best remember who your friend are."
I got a cold mind to go tripping across that thin line
I ain't makin' straight time
Eight years in, it feels like you're gonna die
But you get used to anything
Sooner or later it becomes your life
Kitchen floor in the evening, tossin' my little babies high
Mary's smilin', but she watches me out of the corner of her eye
Seems you can't get any more than half free
I step out onto the front porch, and suck the cold air deep inside of me
Got a cold mind to go tripping cross that thin line
I'm sick of doin' straight time
In the basement, huntin' gun and a hacksaw
Sip a beer, and thirteen inches of barrel drop to the floor
Come home in the evening, can't get the smell from my hands
Lay my head down on the pillow
And, go driftin' off into foreign lands
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“I overthink and have trouble sleepin’ / All purpose gone and don’t have a reason / And there’s no doctor to stop this bleedin’ / So I left home and jumped in the deep end,” Ed Sheeran sings in verse one. He continues by adding that this person is feeling the weight of having disappointed his father and doesn’t have any friends to rely on in this difficult moment. In the second verse, Ed sings about the role of grief in his friend’s plight and his dwindling faith in prayer. “Saturday night is givin’ me a reason to rely on the strobe lights / The lifeline of a promise in a shot glass, and I’ll take that / If you’re givin’ out love from a plastic bag,” Ed sings on the chorus, as his friend turns to new vices in hopes of feeling better.
This is a great song indeed. However, Charlie does not kill himself at the end of the song. Why would anybody saw off a shotgun to shoot themselves...? The reason you saw off a shot gun is to increase the spread of the pellets increase your range of damage. Like another reply stated, this is Charlie reverting back to his old ways of crime and violence. He's doing this because he simply cannot succeed, support, or survive in a normal life.
One thought to support that he did kill himself in reference to sawing of the shotgun - If you were going to kill yourself with a shotgun you'd almost have to saw off a portion of it in order to reach the trigger while pointing it at yourself. He can't move on even if hes trying to live the right way, goes out and takes a final breath of fresh air, and this time "Got a cold mind to go tripping cross that thin line" has a different meaning not that he has the urge to live a criminal life but that he realizes he can never move on, and the thought of killing himself arises, because the last thing he wants to do is serve "straight time". He drinks beer to get the courage to do it. The 13 inches of barrel dropping to the floor isn't the saw'd off part of the gun, but rather the "sawd off" shotgun itself dropping to the floor as he kills himself. The last phrase of 'come home in the evening, can't get the smell from my hands' is his realization that he killed himself (Go driftin' off in foreign lands)and realizes he can't change what was done. <br /> -That's just my take on it but agree it could be seen anyway, and afterall that is what makes this music so great. It should be interpreted however the listener takes it. All songs have different meanings to different people.
I see your perspective, and I agree that's an interesting take on the song. I've performed this song many times, and indeed it can be viewd in many ways. When Charlie says "can't get the smell from my hands", I think he is referring to the smell from working at the rendering plant. Another example of how he can't stand doing straight time. I really think he is planning another crime here, another way to do hard time, and not contemplating suicide, but like I said, there's many ways to view this song. Only the writer knows the true intention.