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If Lyrics

In order for one to metamorphises from ones inner-self being projected out into the astral plane, and to rematerialize into an inanimate object, or another living organism for that matter, is entirely and absolutley an impossible. However,

If I was your TV, I'd be like, "look at me"
If I was a shooting star, I'd be like "Shhh...ping!"
If I was a fat bitches thong, I'd be like "Hell naw!"
If I was a hotties thong, I'd be like "Aww"
If I was a cuss word, I'd just be like "Fuck"
If I was a rock on the moon, I'd be chillin like "Sup?"
If I was a butthole, I'd just be an exit
If I was the D.O.C, I'd be like "Man, this is bullshit"
If I was your tires on your car, I'd be like "Yeeerrrrrr!"
If I was the bumper on your car, I'd be like "Ow fuck!"
If I was a ballon, I'd be like "Pap!! Psshh..."
If I was Mellisa Milano, I'd be fuckin Joe Bruce
If I was a radio DJ, I'd probably say "The Point, 103"
If I was a richy ass bitch, I'd be like "Um, okay"
If I was Spin magizine, I'd put a mirror on the cover, and be like "Fuck us, and all our readers, even this motherfucker"
If I was your mental stress, I'd be catching up
If I was your headaches, everynow and then I'd be like "Thuuuuump"
And if I was your tounge, I'd be hating your teeth, I'd be like "Oww! Why you alway bite me, everytime we try to eat?"
If I was a chair, I'd be like "Sit here"
And if I was Kid Rock, I'd cut my feathered wolf hair
If I was your muffler, I'd be like "Shh, quietly"
And if I was a price tag, I'd be like, "You ain't buyin me"
If I was a fresh DJ, I'd be like ......
If I was Jam Master J, I'd be like .....
If I was a cheap clock radio, I'd be like "Ffffff (tune that mother fucker in)
If I was Berry White, I'd be like "What up ya'll?"
If I was a nipple in the cold, I'd be like (Boing)
If I was your dead uncle, I'd be like.....
If I was a raindrop, I'd just be like ....
And if I had an axe and your neck, I might say "Chop!"

If I was, if I was, but I'll never be
If I was, if I was, but I'll never be
If I was, if I was, but I'll never be
If I was, if I was, but I'll never be
If I was, if I was, but you're killing me
If I was, if I was, but you're killing me
If I was, if I was, but I'll never be
If I was, if I was, but I'll never be

If I was a Faygo at one of our shows,
I'd fly through the air, into an ocean of juggalos
If I was Andre the Giant, "This is how I'd be like"
If I was Father MC, I'd be like "Now, what happend?"
If I was a mirror, I'd find another mirror, and look each other dead in the face, crystal clear
If I was a slider, I'd slide out your butt, I'd be floatin in your toilet, looking at you like "whut?"
If I was a pilot, I'd be like "Traffic control"
If I was John Denver, I'd be like "Nooooo!"
If I was a switch, I'd be like "Flick me"
If I was a london cop car, I'd be like "Weee Wooo Weee Wooo"
If I was Chewbacca, I'd get me a fresh ass fade
If I was Vanilla Ice, I'd be like "Fuck ya'll, I'm still paid"
If I was a stop sign, I'd just be like "Stop"
If I was your wooden leg, I'd still be given you the hip hop

If I was, if I was, but I'll never be
If I was, if I was, but I'll never be
If I was, if I was, but I'll never be
If I was, if I was, but I'll never be
If I was, if I was, but you're killing me
If I was, if I was, but you're killing me
If I was, if I was, but I'll never be
If I was, if I was, but I'll never be
Song Info
Submitted by
nikuku On Nov 25, 2001
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15 Meanings

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Cover art for If lyrics by Insane Clown Posse

This song is really cool, because it makes me think on..."What if...". After I listened to this song, I sat down for like 2 hours just thinking on "What if..." stuff, you'd be surprised on how much you can learn!

Cover art for If lyrics by Insane Clown Posse

whatever you weird ass

Cover art for If lyrics by Insane Clown Posse

I thought it was cool, but you must have been stoned to sit around for two hours thinking of "what if..."

Cover art for If lyrics by Insane Clown Posse

lmao. that's pretty awesome. ^_~

Cover art for If lyrics by Insane Clown Posse

What?why?

Cover art for If lyrics by Insane Clown Posse

yeah i'm with Twiztid-Juggalette...it does kinda make u think alil bit. and i think its like...well..um..hes kinda saying hes not good enough for someone or something.

Cover art for If lyrics by Insane Clown Posse

insane clown posse. what were they thinking. they have their funny moments, like the stuff they say in between, other than that...what were they thinking?

Cover art for If lyrics by Insane Clown Posse

The only thing this song makes me think is "what if.. ICP never existed?"

Cover art for If lyrics by Insane Clown Posse

If ICP never existed, we wouldn't know about them, so we'd just find some other band to listen to/hate on.

This song is pretty good, although My Axe, Radio Stars, and Mr. Happy are better songs coming from this CD (Bizzar).

Cover art for If lyrics by Insane Clown Posse

If ICP decided to take cheap shots at you in a crappy song, would you care?

I know i wouldn't