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Hooker with a Penis Lyrics

I met a boy wearing Vans, 501s, and a
Dope Beastie t, nipple rings, and
New tattoos that claimed that he
Was OGT,
From '92,
The first EP.

And in between
Sips of Coke
He told me that
He thought
We were sellin' out,
Layin' down,
Suckin' up
To the man.

Well now I've got some
A-dvice for you, little buddy.
Before you point the finger
You should know that
I'm the man,

And if I'm the man,

Then you're the man, and
He's the man as well so you can
Point that fuckin' finger up your ass.

All you know about me is what I've sold you,
Dumb fuck.
I sold out long before you ever even heard my name.

I sold my soul to make a record,
Dip shit,
And you bought one.

So I've got some
Advice for you, little buddy.
Before you point your finger
You should know that
I'm the man,

If I'm the fuckin' man
Then you're the fuckin' man as well
So you can
Point that fuckin' finger up your ass.

All you know about me is what I've sold you,
Dumb fuck.
I sold out long before you ever even heard my name.

I sold my soul to make a record,
Dip shit,
And you bought one.

All you read and
Wear or see and
Hear on TV
Is a product
Begging for your
Fatass dirty
Dollar

So, shut up and

Buy my new record
Send more money
Fuck you, buddy.
Song Info
Submitted by
implode On Apr 06, 2001
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239 Meanings

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Cover art for Hooker with a Penis lyrics by Tool

This is about some kid talking to Maynard about Undertow. The kid, declaring himself a true Tool fan (OGT - Original Gangsta Tool) apparently called MJK a sellout for releasing Undertow, a major label record. Maynard turns his words around into the chorus that says, "We all participate in capitalism, so by saying you don't like it, you're being hypocritical." He goes on to say that the kid knows nothing about him except for what Maynard lets him know, so he's in no position to tell him how to live. Just invest in Tool and your soul is safe.

Actually...when asked about Hooker with a Penis...the song is NOT ABOUT a specific converstaion with a Tool fan...its an imaginary converstaion Maynard is having based on his own artisitic fear that with Tool's monetary success...that people..their fans...will believe they have sold out...I bet anyone who has heard that song has though twice about confronting Maynard that they have sold out

Not Valid

Actually... he was talking to me about it. I told him Tool sucks and that his mom probably liked sticking carrots up his ass as a kid and he got all mad. But he also said he'd write me a song.

Not Valid

It also has ties to the original bass player(Paul D'Amour) leaving. In an interview, Maynard said that Paul suffered from "indie guilt" and didn't want the band getting any bigger than it already was from Undertow.

Not Valid
Cover art for Hooker with a Penis lyrics by Tool

I disagree. I don't think that he's saying capitalism is the H w/ a P, He's saying that HE's the H w/ a P. He's like "You know what buddy, (I love when he says buddy!) I might have sold myself (hooker), but I'M still the one who fucking YOU!(-he's got the cock) So fuck you." That's what it is. Most definitely.

Cover art for Hooker with a Penis lyrics by Tool

I think you guys are wrong about the name I think that Hooker With A Penis is a reference to "You only know what I've sold you" Meaning, You only know the surface of Maynard. I.E. What he wants you to know. He's the hooker and you don't know he has a penis. Which is saying that you have no idea what really lies beneath.

Cover art for Hooker with a Penis lyrics by Tool

This song taught me everything I needed to know to pass High School economics

Cover art for Hooker with a Penis lyrics by Tool

I don't think this song is purposefully about capitalism. It's more about hypocrisy, just Maynard responding to people who tell the band that they are selling out.

This kid has the audacity to tell Maynard that Tool is "selling out and sucking up to the man" for making a major-label record, even though he's wearing brand name clothes, drinking Coke, and getting tattoos of products. And Maynard is calling him out on his hypocrisy and telling him that unless he's willing to throw away his clothes and get rid of his tattoos, he can just shut his fucking mouth.

Cover art for Hooker with a Penis lyrics by Tool

All I have to say is why does this song have the rating it does? What fool rated it low? This song is not only hilarious but it brings a good point across and is just entertaining. The chorus is great to sing along with. Tool will always be a great band.

Cover art for Hooker with a Penis lyrics by Tool

This song is a big FUCK to all the "dip shit" who repeatedly call bands sell outs. EVERY single band who ever releases an album is litterally a sell out. MJK is basically telling all of them "We live in a capitalist world, deal with it. Criticizing bands for this only shows you're a dumb fuck who's completely missing the point. You're criticizing, but you're the one getting fucked in the end, so don't tell me what to do."

I think we can apply this message to other aspects of the world than the capitalist system. This represents the essence of Maynard's message saying , we all have our flaws, don't be a fuckin' hypocrite and admit that you are a inperfect person as well. The world would be a much more peaceful place if more people thaught this way.

Cover art for Hooker with a Penis lyrics by Tool

I absolutely love this song.

Cover art for Hooker with a Penis lyrics by Tool

i like that tool throw's out props to the beastie boys. I think this song is very unique in the manner that from what i understand there was a lil controversy over bands selling out so to speak and tool just like many other major bands within the culture of music "sale out". Honestly, we as fans dont truly know the individuals writing and recording these songs, and I think the point of this entire song is that whether or not TOOL sold out or not is irrelevent because the music that they write and produce continues to be amazing and what we the consumer want more and more of. Honestly, there people just like everyone else. They believe what they want and leave the rest up to the individual to believe what they want. At the end of the day, there pretty awesome and create well thought out and well put togethor music that we all love and enjoy. If that makes them a "sale out" then so be it, im going to keep buying there shit.

@walter2boys Actually, Maynard is not giving props to the Beastie Boys (nor is he dissing them). The guy calling Maynard and Tool out as sellouts is meant to be ironic. He purports himself as the hardcore fan, "The OG", and all around cool guy, but he's clearly bought into the popular culture of coolness. He's wearing Levi's Jeans, low-pro Vans shoes, has freshly inked tattoos (suggesting he's only recently adopted his identity and sense of style), has typical piercings, and drinks Coca-Cola. The Beastie Boys shirt is just another outward expression of perceived internal coolness. Whose going to ever say...

Cover art for Hooker with a Penis lyrics by Tool

lol ive never heard it but the lyrics are fucking hilarious