In Too Deep

I've always thought of this song as a guy who loves the girl perhaps more than she loves him. He's letting her go before its too late for him to love someone else. He knows this isn't going to work despite how much he wants it to.

It's about commitment, insecurities, selfish behavior and timing.

All this time, I still remember everything you said There's so much you promised, how could I ever forget.

(I personally think this chorus comes from her point of view...and what she said still haunts him) Listen, you know I love you, but I just can't take this, You know I love you, but I'm playing for keeps, Although I need you, I'm not gonna make this, You know I want to, but I'm in too deep.

(Seems like she was ready to take it to the next level - and he wasn't at the time. He is selfish and afraid to commit, could be due to bad relationships in the past, the issues and demons are eating away at him and consumes him. All this time she was there for him, supporting him, giving the relationship 100%, while he was only taking. She is spent, her spirit is broken, she can't rely on false hope, she is in too deep - so she moves on and cuts him off)

Ooh I know you're going, but I can't believe It's the way that you're leaving, It's like we never knew each other at all, it may be my fault, I gave you too many reasons, being alone, when I didn't want to I thought you'd always be there, I almost believed you

(He never thought that it would end like this - at first he is in denial about how it might have been his fault. He can't believe she is gone)

So listen, listen to me, I can feel your eyes go thru me

(She knows in her heart based on what she has been through that he will never come around - so she looks right through him and doesn't care any more)

It seems I've spent too long Only thinking about myself - oh Now I want to spend my life Just caring bout somebody else.

When she is no longer in his life, available for him, at his disposal - he realizes how he was selfish he was and now will be a better person for the next woman that comes into his life.

This is my interpretation of it.

"All this time, I still remember everything you said". Yep. I always will. Every word that You said. :) One of their best songs,and they have a lot of great songs.

Everytime I hear this song, I think about him, and I can almost hear him singing it to me...

He was just so stuck with all his thoughts, about the past and the future, what he had done or could do with his life, that he forgot to care for her, to actually notice that there WAS somebody there for him, instead of just wondering who would be later on. He lived too much in the future, forgetting to enjoy the present. He had too many personal problems and issues, so that kept him from making a move and going for it, even when she promised she would alwaywas be there, no matter what happened between them.

And he said he loved her, but since he didn't want to have any kind of relationship with her, other than friendship (because of his many personal issues), she came to a point where she thought everything he said was a lie. How could he really love her, if he wasn't gonna try anything? Why not give her the chance, then? So she confronted him and told him everything was a lie.

But... According to him, everything was true. He DID love her, but he just had too many problems at the time. His mind was so troubled that he couldn't just start a relationship with anyone, since he knew it would be no good. He would end up hurting her, and messing up what they already had. First he had to change all the bad things in his life, so then they could be together in the future. He did want her, real bad... But he couldn't take all of it at the time, it was too much for him.

So, time took its toll on her, and she realized she couldn't just be there on her knees for someone who would never live up to her; she was fighting a war she could not win, or so she thought. She really REALLY loved him so much, but she wouldn't wait forever. She had to be happy as well, and to be happy she had to forget him. But since they spoke everyday and were just as good friends as ever... She had to cut through that friendship, no matter how much it hurted; it was necessary, and he would understand it was for her good.

After this happened, he just couldn't believe it. Was she for real? What about everything she said and promised? He thought she would always wait for him, no matter what... He sort of understood, since he was the one who didn't want to try things out, the one who didn't give her a chance, even when he loved her so much and wanted to be with her, just at the same time he felt so lonely. But why just end it up all at once? Not talking anymore, like they were strangers... Did she really hate him that much? Now he had no hope after all, since he thought she was the only one who could understand him, and he almost believed it. But no, she left, and he's alone again.

And now it's about time he acknowledged all the mistakes he's done. He ruined everything by worrying only about himself and his problems; he spent so much time on it, that he forgot to enjoy life at it's fullest. The fear got a hold on him, so that kept him from trying, and that was what ruined their relationship. But he would not make the same mistake again. Now, when the right person came in, he would spend that same time he did on himself, just caring about her, whoever she might be. 'Cause now it was too late to try it with this woman. And he still loves her, and wants her to never forget it or to ever doubt it, because it's true.

He really wanted to, but he couldn't...

And that's my interpretation, since that's how I relate to it. It's purely personal, ok?

To me, this song represents alot of things. The main being that he was going through a tough time in his life. A time irrelevant to the person he was with. He wants to be with this person, but it seems its too late. Like he's a different person now.

I dont think it has to do anything with anybody cheating. The girl has always been good to him it seems.

"All that time I was searching, nowhere to run to"

These sound like personal problems that have nothing to do with the significant other. Like the other person expects him to be someone, but he is someone else now after going through the difficult time (whatever that may be).

Just my 2 cents.

BTW...f'n great song.

"I can feel your eyes go thru me, But I don't know why."

"t seems I've spent too long Only thinking about myself - oh Now I want to spend my life Just caring bout somebody else."

To me this song is about a person who was not giving enough love to the girl in his life .. and though she promised a lot , now that since she didnt get reciprocation from him.. she is moving on.

And he though he didnt treat her as she should have been, always took her for granted that she will be with him and now that she is leaving he could not believe it.

He realizes that he needs her .. to care for her.. but now she is with some one else and though he wants to get back to her and make her his own, he could not do it. And he is not able to take it.

Love is complex when you have had past troubles in your life. My interpretation is that while he was ready to commit to her, he was not in a place where he could ever give her 100% of himself since he had so much past trauma that diluted who he really was; he didn't even realize that he was incapable of being the man (back then) for her.

The idea of them being together was so amazing. There was so much she promised to bring to his life, and yet he couldn't convince her to be with him. So he begs her to listen to him justify why he is the man for her, but she can't connect with his argument or to him emotionally. He knows the man he is and he thinks he is worthy, but after everything he tries fails, he sits as a hollowed out soul trying to figure why it couldn't work.

She promised that she'd always be there for him as a friend and he pretty much believed her, being that she was the only one who ever truly saw him for who he was underneath the veil that he draped over him to hide his past. She sees the genuine friendship that they have and the emotional compatibility, but she can't be attracted to him since a core piece of him is missing. His masculinity? Or maybe is it his confidence. Either way his desperate attempts to convince her made her uncomfortable since she knew she could never be more than friends with him. His pleas now replace their friendship and with no real communication she is left alone. She distances herself from him and their once blossoming friendship fades away. It's like they never knew each other at all.

She 'leaves' their friendship knowing it will never be the same again. He is heartbroken and he realizes that he needs to make something of his life; there must have been something he did wrong to mess up something that was this good, this important. So he does some introspection and he realizes that the problem is with him. Eventually, after a long while, he fixes that part of himself, perhaps another genesis song would lend a clue as to what he fixed in the first place. Regardless, he is now ready to stop thinking only about himself and is ready to move on and get his life together and spend his life caring about somebody else. He knows his friendship and love for her were too strong to ever let go of so he seeks her out after all this time apart to rekindle their friendship.

His heart is so sore after the initial rejection and he knows she is still apprehensive about him. He lets her know that while he loves her he can't handle another round of hurt/rejection as yet, if he tries to be with her now it's not for a casual relationship but for a lifelong one, supposedly marriage; he's playing for keeps. He is keenly aware that even though he is a different man than who he was before she is so much more than a regular girl to him. He needs her in his life first and foremost and can't stand losing her again.

They both know he wants to be with her, but he's in too deep and can't lose her again... at least not right now.

sad song.. i love it.. totally understand what hes saying.

I always took it as the guy was going through a really bad part of his life and then he found this girl that seem to make everything ok.

But then later on after saying she was always going to be with him (I thought you'd always be there, I almost believed you,) she is telling him it's over.

And it would seem almost as if he didn't see it coming and now maybe she already has someone else and she still wants to be friends with the guy singing the song, so thats why it goes..

"Listen, you know I love you, but I just can't take this, You know I love you, but I'm playing for keeps, Although I need you, I'm not gonna make this, You know I want to, but I'm in too deep."

He loves her, but he won't be running 2nd to someone else so thats why he says "He's playing for keeps" and yeah he needs her but he won't be able to deal with that. Add to that, I get the feeling that when they broke up all the sudden she started acting like they never had anything, that could be where the lines "its like we never knew eachother at all" comes from, still he's torn and wants to blame himself at parts of the song because he just can't figure out why shes leaving.. and at the same time she seems to be unable to understand why he's taking it soo bad.

Most of these Phil Collins songs are about broken romance, which is understandable considering the messy break up from his first wife, Andrea.