Cloud On My Tongue

"..there's a wonderful acceptance in Cloud On My Tongue, an acceptance of being in circles and circles again. That's its whirlpool vat. It all leads to that. --I travel a lot around the world, and I went to all sorts of places, and I ran in to different people. Borneo had something that I didn't have. It was a very free, hot, jungly place, and the people that, or a person that came from there, had something that I didn't have that I desperately wanted, which was this no rigidity. When I say Leave the wood outside, what, all the girls here are freezing cold, leave me with your Borneo...Or don't leave me with your Borneo, because I've had it before, and that's why I need the wood, because it just -- you can go now, you're already in there, whether it's pregnant or whether it's just infused. You don't even have to hang around and watch me disintegrate, because you've already done your job. You've already accomplished what you wanted, which was another scalp on your belt, and you did it. That's not one of my more favorite men songs." [Tori Amos, The Baltimore Sun, 1994]

About thinking that you've made it, only to find out that you're actually just going in circles - "Thought I was over the bridge now". The girl in the song wanted to get through this without getting hurt, but she's already infected with the cancer of her situation, she's already scarred (or "tattooed") by what's happened to her. And yet she can't stop getting herself back into the same mess. Gorgeous.

I have a VERY close and personal relationship with this song, perhaps more than Tori's other songs...and I think it's HER most intensely personal piece after Little Earthquakes. But it develops a remarkable intensity in an abstract, as opposed to confessional, manner.

Basically, it's a song about emotional dependency. The "Borneo" is the state of passion and love. Meanwhile, the "wood outside" is her former lover's (or lover who cheats) love, which creates the steamy passion of the "Borneo". When her lover comes back, she wishes not for him (telling him to "leave the wood outside"), but simply for the feeling that he has created: of love, even though he has hurt her deeply. The second verse ("Don't stop now what you're doing...") is perhaps a response to his arrival at the "kitchen door": she is no longer sensitive to his infidelity, and in order to affirm her invulnerability, she tells him to continue with his current dalliances. The line "You're already in there" means that she no longer needs him in his actuality in order to be loved; she has internalized their past love, and so no longer needs his hurtful actual presence. However, she acknowledges that she's still in love with him, and forever marked by his love, when she says "she'll be wearing (his) tattoo." In other words, she no longer needs his lovemaking or direct affection, because he now exists inside of her. His arrival has disturbed her status quo state of being in love with him, but unhurt by him more directly, because he is not there to hurt her further by his actions ("leave me the way I was before.") This can also be read as a wish that they had never been in love, when her emotions were not imprisoned by him. Saying that she is "in circles again" repeatedly emphasizes the difficulty of breaking free from being emotionally bound to the nameless lover, as does the song's frequent repetition. Even though her lover is gone, she is still internally bound to him, and reliant on the love that he once created. The house, the physical situation in which the song takes place, doubles as a metaphor for the speaker's heart. She is "not over the bridge" from her previous dependent state, which she realizes once he arrives at her house. All in all, Tori at her best.

This is obviously about being affected by a guy who simply sees her as just a notch on his belt. She's now part of his collection with all the freezing girls he's left behind. She thought she could handle it when it started/she knew what she was getting into, that he was a player...'someone's knocking on my kitchen door...'saying she doesn't need much to keep her warm, she's not like the other girls. But she's got this cloud, this idea that she's better than or can be more than the other girls he's had. Before she knows it she's in 'circles and circles and circles again...' She thought she was clear of him, she was over the bridge but nope! As a woman who's been in this situation, this is a very powerful song.

The hereinmyhead website had quotes indicating this song is about Anthony Kedis.

Interesting. I assumed the "wood" was referring to the man in particular. "Leave the wood outside" - pretty clear that she wants him to go away.

This song never fails to make me weak at the knees, just a beautiful song.

I heard this song performed live in concert and the first thing that came to mind was sex. Maybe Tori caught me on a demented day.. but the "circles and circles" brings me back to ole raspberry swirl. I assumed it was about losing virginity. "over the bridge" and the sexual meaning of "you're already in there" which puts a great image in my head. there's "I'll be wearing your tattoo" which would be the most beautiful sensual metaphor, being one with someone, you're in their skin, they're inside you. How beautiful. And then "cloud on my tongue" seemed to capture some oral sex meaning. And "don't need much to keep me warm" is being close to someone, in their arms. But hey, no matter what it means... it's still a beautiful beautiful song.

Tori's explanations make no sense. irony? anyway, i want her, bad.

I agree with dedgrrlsdance that it's about sex... It seems to me shes hung up on this guy, and maybe he doesn't like her as much as her/is using her...maybe he already has a girl: "it won't be fair if I hate her"..."hard to hide a hundred girls in your hair." But even so, he's "already in there"--"i'll be wearing your tattoo" perhaps suggests even though she knows he's using her she still loves him--i love the image it creates: he's left his mark on her.

The "circles and circles again" part seems to suggest simply that shes going round in circles with him--hes just using her again&again.