| Paramore – Tell Me How Lyrics | 6 years ago |
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**this song meaning related me to dealing with a breakup over addiction** I can't call you a stranger But I can't call you ** I love him, but his drinking was first. It always was no matter how hard I tried to “fix” it. I can never look at him as a stranger even tho I didn’t even know who he was when he was drinking.. I just knew I had to leave that situation. As well as stop calling him whenever I terribly missed him** I know you think that I erased you You may hate me but I can't hate you And I won't replace you **during the last years of our four year relationship, I did a coward thing instead of breaking up with him, I ended up talking to another man who I grew very fond off and got caught speaking to him. It was very romantic and with him seeing those broke my heart even more. He thinks I replaced him even tho it wasn’t like that.. I was so lonely and just didn’t have anyone to talk to about this. My family and friends already judge him, still doing that didn’t make me feel any better after I got caught*** Tell me how to feel about you now Tell me how to feel about you now Oh, let me know Do I suffocate or let go? **i have my days where I’m so upset and on the verge to calling him but I always remember how we could never fix the problem at this time, all we can do is just enjoying each other’s company, even tho deep down I was suffocating ** Think I'm tired of getting over it Just starting something new again I'm getting sick of the beginnings And always coming to your defences I guess it's good to get it off my chest I guess I can't believe I haven't yet You know I got my own convictions And they're stronger than any addiction But no one's winning ** dealing with an addiction from a love one is the hardest thing I have ever dealt with in my life. I know he loves me , and if it wasn’t for drinking, we would be together.. be married. And start growing our family, but it was always back to start one, once the drinking got out of control again.. I also realized how me being so upset and angry at him when he was trying to sober and get help didn’t help when all I would do is bring up the past..** Tell me how to feel about you now Tell me how to feel about you now Oh, let me know Do I suffocate or let go? Tell me how to feel about you now Tell me how to feel about you now Oh, let me know Do I suffocate or let go? You keep me up with your silence Take me down with your quiet Of all the weapons you fight with Your silence is the most violent **its always when I’m alone or I look at our pictures and videos we shared the past four years.i look at all the good times but quickly see scars on my arms that remind me going so crazy for him and climbing on top of trash cans to beg him to speak to me again. To him punching the window telling me to get lost and never speak to him again.. we definitely got violent, it was more if anything.. I hated when he became a zombie whenever he was drunk and honestly it made me feel somewhat relieved to get some reaction from even if it was completely negative, it was better than seeing him being past out for hours*** Tell me how to feel about you now Tell me how to feel about you now Oh, let me know Do I suffocate or let go? Tell me how to feel about you now Tell me how to feel about you now Oh, let me know Do I suffocate or let go? You don't have to tell me If you ever think of me I know you say you're busy Wildly, in the fog of your memory You don't have to tell me, I can still believe **this lyric at the end still hasn’t hit me, because I’m still in the process of not accepting things of how our beautiful relationship was ruined by an addition. I love him. I truly do and know he is a good guy, I still hope I will get a text or even a letter just to see if he thinks of me.. I guess I’m slowly getting it. Even if I’m in denial.*** |
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