Listening to: Frances Farmer Will Have Her Revenge on Seattle

So now my mother says she doesn't want to be near me because I'm turning into a maniac? I could practically feel my heart stop beating inside of me when she said that. My own mother thinks I'm a maniac and claims my writing is driving me to insanity.  Why won't she take care of me already if she feels that way. Why won't she say something if she reads my poetry or my "letters" that I write but never send out?

Screw you. I officially can't stand anyone.

I have some questions and I thought maybe you guys on songmeanings.net could answer

1) how do I delete or edit a previous journal entry

2) how do I embed videos in my journal? As you can see, I've done it before but it hasn't worked ever since this new layout. what the hell happened?

3) What is your absolute favorite thing about songmeanings.net??

Listening to: very ape
Random Notes:
--Nosa is having a love affair with a scarecrow (haha)
--Dance tonight. Bad music but i love my friends!
--Saw Delirius last night and love Michael Pitt (hey! dont judge me!)

(aw)

--I made my Christmas list. So far its just a few albums (Bleach, Ramones, some Foo Fighters) and a couple of band teeshirts (the Who, RHCP, Led Zeppelin).
--Dads been nice lately. I wonder what he wants...

* Song changes to Radio Friendly.... *

Art is tomorrow. I can't wait! We're doing 3D stuff and Susan is gonna right my highschool reccomendations. She's so nice to everyone, I wish I was that nice.  I just...I don't even know.  Some people are just so mean to me and judge me and label everything i do. And examine my every move, my every word. I just feel so selfconscious on the inside, but I dont dare show it. Atleast Nora is just as wacky weird as me, I would probably have no friends if it weren't for her. Shes like the glue that sticks me with my other friends.

* Song changes to All Apologies *

I just kinda feel like no one knows me anymore. Except for myselff...

He was born with gravel in his throat
And in his mouth a plastic spoon, already used
He called it a day and walked away
Before I came around
But now I see him everyday
And hope that he will remain
In his eyes was the image of despair
And the essence of all things unfair
You wante to cry
He only talks now throught the emotions inspired
When you see his desperate face
You gave him away and put him to shame
Before he could saw a word
or so I've heard...
Leave us alone
Everyone needs their own home
And thought he spoke like an agel
Ready to sleep
Over his miserably ashes
I now weep.
(guess who?)

 Perfume: A Story of a Murderer
He lived to find beauty. He killed to possess it.
I really liked this movie I hope you do too!

Part1:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/9oOQxatC5a4&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/9oOQxatC5a4&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part2:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/A_OPO5u_Fsw&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/A_OPO5u_Fsw&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part3: Not Found (suck it up, its still a great movie even if you miss 9 minutes)

Part4:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/0DYxLPUXhss&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/0DYxLPUXhss&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part5:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/qNQkef-YYHg&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/qNQkef-YYHg&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part6:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/vEq2AOHcLrY&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/vEq2AOHcLrY&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

 Part7:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/-ElcNd0KMJo&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/-ElcNd0KMJo&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part8:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/7zRiVB40MhI&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/7zRiVB40MhI&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part9:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/oh4YbKX9I6I&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/oh4YbKX9I6I&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part10:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/OWKfmPMbWug&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/OWKfmPMbWug&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part11:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/v8LzwP5Cb9Q&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/v8LzwP5Cb9Q&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part12:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/jJityZAwucg&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/jJityZAwucg&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part13:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/ZeeAS2ScZZY&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/ZeeAS2ScZZY&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part14:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/1sWJ5Z61cCE&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/1sWJ5Z61cCE&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Part15:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/SY8MOGQG7D8&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/SY8MOGQG7D8&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Credits:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/kzh8-BUBCKY&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/kzh8-BUBCKY&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/xUau8UGjJ2c&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/xUau8UGjJ2c&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

nora says this is good, but youtube isnt working so i have to put it here to see it!

First of all, I love the new setup and system on SongMeaningLyrics. Awesome.

Listening to: Icky Thump by the White Stripes

Ehm. How was everyone's Halloween? Well, right now I'm sitting at my desk with my comfy flannel PJ pants on, 3 empty cans of Doctor Pepper infront of me ('cause I never really "woke up" today. been taking 5 minute naps every half-hour or so). TACHS test is on Friday, and I know I'm screwed. Haha, and everyone is begging me to tell them my top 3 highschools. Just glad to know I won't be winding up with any of these guys in highschool. After 8th grade, i'm OUTTA here.

Wow so guitar lessons are a total disaster.  According to Paul, I have an excellent natural feel and an awesome sense of rhythm, but my playing level is so high that reading music is even harder and more boring. Whatever, man, I don't even practice the shizzit you give me.  Play a few scales and move my fingers a bit, that's all. 

And now my obsession with writing has gotten even worse.  I used to fill up the corner of a page with lyrics to a Nirvana song or doodle something. Now, I find there is no boundary at all. I don't even bother using lines or lining up my words.  I completely zone out and 5 minutes later, I see I have 3 pages filled up with poetry I don't even remember coming up with, but I know exactly what it means. Creepy, no?  I don't recall writing any of it.  I have to reread it just incase Miss K suddenly decides to grade our notebooks. And i write on everything...my notebooks, folders, desk, my hand, my books, my pencil case...oh gosh.

Eek! Art started again on October 25th! Only 5 people in the class...Me, Evan, Karen, Molly, and the teacher (Susan). I like small classes better.  Susan says we're making another artist book this session and I'm psyched. Ofcourse my theme will be black and white patterns with color and text accents. Woot! I am excited about this one!

That's pretty much it for now. Oh, and now there's a rumor going around that my eyes aren't really blue-green because I wear contacts. Woowww...hahaa

Peace and love to you all.