I've got a job now. I'm a slave to the wage. Hopefully this time around I can get enough money to get through university. My job seems pretty simple, although I only had my first day today and it was just training. I have to book customers into hotels. They call me, I find the hotel they want, try to sell them a bit more stuff than they want, and at the end of the week I get paid. I have to work one weekend a month now. I hope it won't affect my relationship with my girlfriend. It shouldn't be too much of a problem. My band may be falling apart at the moment it seems. Everyone except the band leader, Matt, wants to move our style out of pop-punk and into something less restrictive, less formulaic, less shit. He just doesn't seem to develop his taste in music, and it really bothers me. I've clandestinely formed another band, with a friend and her friend. We were jamming the other day and came up with a very excellent hardcore song. We decided that hardcore would be our genre, or at least our guideline. I've just been developing my taste for the harder side of music, so this is perfect for me. Perhaps I can persuade the guitarist to play mathcore...

I was supposed to have a job interview today, but I completely forgot about it. What kind of moron am I? Luckily, they phoned me around midday and we scheduled another one for next week. I suppose they must be keen to see me. How could I possibly be this forgetful? It must be some sort of disorder.

I'm not a particularly angry person, but I think that this is such a poignant expression of anger that I can't help but share it. This is a lyrics site after all! I'll drive a stake through the black of your heart Oh Lord I'll pull down your temples and burn every word Father I'll kill all the angels that showed me the light Jesus I'll drift into darkness and tear out the soul of God. It was written by a man who was angry that God took his daughter away from him. It's the first line that I find most effective.

I am in debt. When I was at school I always imagined that being in debt wouldn't be so bad, that it could never compare to the loneliness and anger I felt every day at school. But I was wrong. There is nothing worse than the earth-shattering realisation that you are now an adult, loaded down with debt, and that if you don't get a job within the next two weeks, you won't ever be able to get a loan, go back to university, or do any of the things you might possibly want to do. How can I get rid of my debt? Well, I could win the lottery. I've never played it though, and I'm not a particularly hopeful person so I'm not about to start. I've toyed with the idea of accumulating money through nefarious means, but I have no idea of how to go about doing that, and there are probably several people more experienced and more able than I am. So the only way for me to make any money is to get a job. My dad said he would pay me to rub down the paintwork he did in the shed today, so I'll probably do that tomorrow or sometime. I have an invitation to a job fair the day after tomorrow so I'll go to that with an air of desperation too. I've never understood before just how soul-crushing it is to be an adult. I wish I could go back to my childhood knowing what I know now, but, alas, it is too late.

I can't type accents on the Internet!? How annoying! Well anyway, I spent the last couple of days with my girlfriend on her parents' boat again. I think I'm in love with her now, it took a while but I'm glad I can now say truthfully that I love her. Kinda makes me feel bad that I cheated on her though. Well, I'm sure I'll forget about it eventually. Isn't it hard to add lyrics on this site? Everyone's already posted most of the songs I listen to, it seems. Still, that's not too much of a bad thing I suppose.

I had a pretty shit day today. I went to my friend's house before going to the shops, but I sat in his cat's favorite chair and loads of molted fur stuck to me. Then we walked downtown and we did absolutely nothing, it was a waste of time. Then I got home and I had to make dinner. I made pasta because it's easy to make. However, I also tried to use this little contraption which is supposed to have replaced oven gloves to lift the pan and pour the pasta into the sieve. When I did so, I lost half the pasta down the sink and the other half I had to give to my little brother. That means that I haven't had a single meal all day (I was saving my appetite for dinner). To add to all that, I just had to wash up everybody else's dirty cutlery, glasses, plates etc. etc. I have a big family so I was washing up for about 45 minutes. Isn't it annoying when all the little things add up to make life an exercise in futility?

Oh dear, I appear to have posted three entries in one night. Still, it's ok because I can quit anytime I like. I just read kqedequalsvolvo's journal. It's good to see that someone isn't afraid to say what they think about the people that really wind them up. I think I'll leave you a joke before I go to bed. A man walks into a bar and he is very drunk. Most of the people inside just ignore him until he stands up and shouts 'I had sex with your mum!' at a group of lads. The guys just ignore it and keep drinking, much to the surprise of the clientèle. The drunkard then shouts 'I shagged her in the arse too!' at the lads. Amazingly, they just carry on drinking their beer and talking amicably. Finally the drunkard shouts at the top of his voice 'and she sucked my knob afterwards!' Then one of the men stands up and shouts back... 'Go home Dad, you're pissed!' Aren't I a comedian? You'd probably have laughed a little more if I told it in person.

Because I am a man, I often fail to understand what my female friends mean when they say things are cute. But my girlfriend just sent me a text message that I know for certain is cute... I suppose I should explain that she is going to be sixteen in two weeks. She said that she would like to wait until she is sixteen before we have sex. So anyway she just sent me a text thanking me for being such an understanding boyfriend, thanking me for making her feel like she never though she'd feel (She was referring to her orgasms last time we were in bed together), and just thanking me for being great. She doesn't understand that I'm really a very inconsiderate person... and that's what's cute. I think I'm finally starting to fall in love with her. I suppose if you repeatedly tell someone that you love them, it will eventually start to come true.

Time for another survey! After completing this, I'll do you the favour of writing a journal entry. Oh, and thanks to Leblanc to writing this survey or at least bringing it to the masses. Music Survey (in no particular order) [10 Favorite Bands] 1) Gary Numan 2) Pink Floyd 3) Aphex Twin 4) Nine Inch Nails 5) Mr. Lif 6) Skinny Puppy 7) Dead Kennedys 8) Refused 9) The Buddy Rich Big Band 10) Ade Fenton [10 Favorite Songs, also in no particular order, one each per 'favourite band.'] 1) The Seed of a Lie - Gary Numan 2) Atom Heart Mother Suite - Pink Floyd 3) Avril 14th - Aphex Twin 4) Sanctified - Nine Inch Nails 5) Arise - Mr. Lif 6) Candle - Skinny Puppy 7) Chickenshit Conformist - Dead Kennedys 8) The Deadly Rhythm - Refused 9) West Side Story Medley - The Buddy Rich Big Band 10) Healing - Ade Fenton [Your Top 10 Most Played Songs] 1) The Time of the Beasts - Neurosis 2) Me! I Disconnect from You - Gary Numan 3) My Breathing - Gary Numan 4) Remind Me to Smile - Gary Numan 5) The Now - Mr. Lif 6) That's Too Bad - Gary Numan 7) Are Friends Electric? - Gary Numan 8) Observer - Gary Numan 9) Down in the Park - Gary Numan 10) Cars - Gary Numan [Other] What is your favorite genre of music?: Industrial What is your least favorite genre of music? Country Rock Who is/are your favourite vocalist(s)?: Gary Numan Robert Plant Karen-O David Bowie Jello Biafra Who is/are your favourite guitarist(s)?: Jimmy Page David Gilmour Whoever Jane's Addiction's guitarist is. Who is/are your favourite bassist(s)?: Mick Karn Who is/are your favourite drummer(s)?: John Bonham Buddy Rich Ginger Baker Stephen Perkins Steven Hewitt Neil Peart Do You Download Songs Or Buy CDs?: Both. Mp3/iPod or CD Player?: CD Player at home, MP3 player on the move. How many band shirts/hoodies you own?: Not a single one. What is your favorite band shirt/hoodie?: I don't have any. What music posters do you have up in your room?: Pink Floyd... and that's it. I don't really like posters that much. Do you consider screaming another form of music?: If it fits into the song then it's just as valid as a clean vocal. What album are you ashamed to have?: Robyn - Robyn Have you ever been in a mosh pit?: Yeah a few times. I always think it will be alright, but I always hate it. Last cd you bought?: The Greatest Hits So Far - P.I.L. What song do you love at the moment?: Blue Serge - Skinny Puppy Most annoying song?: She's So Lovely - Scouting For Girls Current Least Favorite Song? Elvis Ain't Dead - Scouting For Girls What was the last song you listened to?: Vendetta - Mezzanine Stairs Last song to be stuck in your head?: Blitzkrieg Bop - The Ramones Do you listen to a variety of music?: Yes. If you could hang out with a musician for a day, who would it be?: Gary Numan! Why?: He seems quite interesting. Is music important to you?: Yes. Could you live without music?: Yeah, but life wouldn't be nearly as enjoyable. Okay, time for the journal! Well, today I went out skateboarding with my friend the guitarist. And it was great! The weather was brilliant, and even though I hadn't done it in about nine months, I was pretty damn good on the wood. I did five kickflips! Five! Well anyway I hope my palpable happiness is contagious. Goodnight!

Well I'll get straight to the point. Last night the lead guitarist of my band was eighteen and he and I went out on the tiles. We went to a club and we were dancing the night away. Later in the night a couple of girls started coming on to us in that way girls do in clubs: dancing provocatively, eventually grinding against us, all that stuff. When the club closed and we all went out on to the street, the girls asked us back to their flat. Guitarist, being single, went with them. But I said 'no, I really shouldn't.' Do you know what that means? It means I didn't cheat on my girlfriend again! I thought that I would probably do it again if I got drunk and had the opportunity, but I didn't. I was a good boy. I'm so proud of myself, but I'm supposed to avoid cheating on her so this should really be all in a day's work for me. And in other news, spending the weekend on my girlfriend's boat was enjoyable. It's quite cute how inexperienced she is. She was very nervous, but I managed to put her at ease. I made her come three times, and we didn't even have sex. I don't know why she lacks confidence, she really has quite an attractive figure. She sent me a text yesterday asking me if there was anything I wanted her to do for me, seeing as she was the one having all the fun last time (her words, not mine). I just replied that she should do whatever she wants to do to me. I can't really think of anything specific and I have no idea what I can actually ask her to do, seeing as she's never done anything with a boy before. Anyway I believe I've written enough now, so until next time, goodbye.