• hey...yeah its wierd now its like now i know its only me seeing this, so it just makes me feel wierd, kinda stupid. Oh well...ill go through today's ____ (what happened today)... well lets start with i stayed up til almost 7am...see i was going to bed at like 6 but i was coughing and like i kinda threw up a lil and i was like swallow! and i did and i just got this feelings like i was going to do it again so i was like fuck this, so i went to the bathroom...and sure enough...i threw up and it was nasty...then i did it a couple more times. So then i was like neat i prob woke mom or dad up casue they wake up like if you dropped a penny on the carpet outside there room theyd wake up...so yeah i was like neat. but they didn't wake up...which supprissed me,and it was getting light outside so i was like :-D YAY!!! so i quickly got back in bed ...and go to sleep...i also wrote my mom to wake me up at 10...she said she did, but i dought she really tried. or maybe i was really out of it...one of the two. so then i wake up at about 12 or so and im like :-\ great, casue mom left to picadilly and i get on here and i was like trying to not let savage know what cXe means and he had it on his profile. i was like :((((((((((((( and i was just thinking neat this day is so fucked up...so kirb im's me and hes like come soon and that made me happy casue we were suppost to trade the drugs (15 mepheridime(sP) for some drugs that he gave me, im taking one right now, um..kirb said it would make me trip out or something i don't know really what it is...:-\ ...so yeah i call my mom and takea shower then i finally call her backa gain and she doesn't answer, so then she calls back and then she comes home and takes me over to kirbys...we had some trouble finding it but we did...so i got there went up to kirbs room, its not as (well i didn't know what to expect) but it was cool... he had all these drugs there and iwas like WoRd... so they fiddled with the computer trying to get it to work...it smoked a couple times, which is funny and me and kirby traded....see it thougth id get like all these drugs and crap and he showed what he was giving me and it was like 5 pills, it was disapointing to say the least...so then kirb asks jesse if he wants some drugs and kirb gives jesse a "sample pack" haha and he kept telling me if i wanted some drugs just tell him, and so i was like can i get some of this or sometihng like that...so then he gave me a sample pack and i got some xanax and some crap....most of this stuff is just anti-stuff and pain meds...so i got out with about 7 pills or so...im taking something...its a really small pill and i hope it starts working..i think it may be beging to work...i don't know though...so then kirbs computer never started working ...so i told him id sale him my old gateway and he was like :-DDDDDDD A LOT and i was like heh: ) so im saling him that...so that will give me some money, which i need... casue im dwindling down to like $15 or so... so then i left kirbs and we all planed to meet at the mall at 6:30...so we all did...well not jesse..he never showed up...but it was me and kirby and like i got there and i just was like...damn i want to be like looking at girls and crap, and kirb was saying "you got megan" when i don't "have" megan,but i was like fuck man i don't care anymore i just want to be all flirty or something, but yeah...there really wasn't to amny girls there...i mean i guess the ones that were i looked at and i knew a copule of them were like looking longer than i was and i wanted to turn and look at them, but i didn't. So my a kirb walk around, i saw kari, or i think it was...it was cool even though it wasn't like a big thing. So we eat..then walk some more, then i guess we go race and we race 3 times on RUSH 2049 and guess who wins everytime we play that game.? me ! heh..i just kill it and kirby almost won...we kept playing casue kirb wanted to win..but i can't allow that! so ya know i get home....and its like i get on the journal and kellys all pissed and im like :-[ casue i didn't mean to or anything... and then i told trev[e]r earier today that i blocked sally and LOW AND BEHOLD he tells sally so sally is mad at me, oh well i can't tell him anything else anymore. so im kinda like :( casue sallys mad and i could unblock her but..i dunno...i guess i should. it just makes me feel bad when shes on and i know she won't talk to me, so i was like ok sence she says she not going to talk to me, then im just going to block her so i don't have to feel so bad, but i guess that made her mad. so i feel stupid, well stupider, ya know..casue i still have feelings and its just gay gay gay of me and i guess everyones right when they tell me its stupid to be acting like this...oh.. well the night went pretty boring i guess.... nothing exciting... i took this drug and i really hope it starts working soon... i don't know what its suppost to do, hopefully makes me all high or something...i don't know, i thought it was working before but i don't know....i just yawned...is that a sign? no i think thats just a normal thing...ok, nevermind... well i jsut thought id write in this today.... its nice knowing (BIG YAWN) that i don't have to worry about what people think about my jounal. But its going to be wierd. but its wierd. liek i wrote this much...jsut for myself.. :-\ anyways night

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