• last nights party sucked btw...not even gonna get into that lol but today was fun; me and k went out to eat today and we walked home, we stopped at this kid z's house, hes a year older but i dont know him and me being as shy as i am didnt really talk at all and hes like so what are u mute or something...i was like cracking up k's just like umm no shes just a little shy lol, and then hes like nice meeting u...awww what a sweetheart (dont worry, im not falling for him, besides hes shorter than me...thats a no no in my world ;]) the whole r thing, just thinking about it makes it seem more and more ridiculous, i still miss him tho =[ i havent seen him in 2 weeks and havn't talked to him in 2 weeks either...grrrr its making me sad. anywyas i just dont know. maybe thats my problem. i over think things to the point where i scare myself out of them. i just cant seem to find the confidence that i need. oh god i wish i could, but i just can't. maybe my hearts trying to tell me something, like that im not read. but i want to be ready. i want to want to be in a relationship. get what i mean? idk maybe i'm the only one...it just seems like i can never catch a break peace love IDK

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