This is a hauntingly beautiful song about introspection, specifically about looking back at a relationship that started bad and ended so poorly, that the narrator wants to go back to the very beginning and tell himself to not even travel down that road. I believe that the relationship started poorly because of the lines:
"Take me back to the night we met:When the night was full of terrors: And your eyes were filled with tears: When you had not touched me yet"
So, the first night was not a great start, but the narrator pursued the relationship and eventually both overcame the rough start to fall in love with each other:
"I had all and then most of you"
Like many relationships that turn sour, it was not a quick decline, but a gradual one where the narrator and their partner fall out of love and gradually grow apart
"Some and now none of you"
Losing someone who was once everything in your world, who you could confide in, tell your secrets to, share all the most intimate parts of your life, to being strangers with that person is probably one of the most painful experiences a person can go through. So Painful, the narrator wants to go back in time and tell himself to not even pursue the relationship.
This was the perfect song for "13 Reasons Why"
To the center of the earth
Or anywhere God decides
Full of fever pulling forth
We hear our call as all
To the center of the earth
As if written in
DNA is reaching out
To your frequency
I want to live
Don't want to die
I want to live
I want to try
All in prayer
Prayer in all
All are scared
Scared of all
Black rooms are calling
To men in leather coats
White labs are cooking
Up the silver ghost
The glass migrates under
Her translucent skin
And all are spiders
Wonder what we've got us in
All is you
You are all
All with you
You in all
I want to live
I don't want to die
I want to live
I want to try
"So it's all very obtuse, because it's all, like, I don't know. So, like, I started thinking that everything I operate on is based on what I believe God was telling me to do. God could be my intuition or whatever, but I always assume, I always assume that the voice I hear is the voice of God. Then I started thinking, what if I'm insane? So I'm operating on the premise that I'm hearing the voice of God or what I perceive to be God speaking to me or through me, but maybe I'm completely in...so all my...demagoguery in my life about me thinking that my life has importance, my, my...thinking that my life has importance. My--my--my thought of it and the fact that I believe I'm following my intuition which in and of itself may be completely false. So then I started freaking out, thinking--of itself may be completely false. And again this creature that believes he's acting upon heavenly intuition but meanwhile he's totally rampant. And I started thinking maybe this is the cause of all the negativity against--and I started thinking maybe this is the cause of all the negativity against--and I started thinking maybe this is the cause of all the negativity against..."
So meets the final coda of a vinyl storm
One more cherry cola to lift up her dead arms
A dream of soft focus, sunsets filters through the din
We are losing contact as she dials it in
She can hear glass calling, or is it someone that looks like him?
She eyes TV reflection, and nods a knowing look
She says it doesn't matter, she never liked her looks
I have seen a thousand fractures, I have seen everything
'Cause knowing is its own answer, love something in a book
There's not much left to ponder, not much left to cook
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
Or anywhere God decides
Full of fever pulling forth
We hear our call as all
To the center of the earth
As if written in
DNA is reaching out
To your frequency
I want to live
Don't want to die
I want to live
I want to try
All in prayer
Prayer in all
All are scared
Scared of all
Black rooms are calling
To men in leather coats
White labs are cooking
Up the silver ghost
The glass migrates under
Her translucent skin
And all are spiders
Wonder what we've got us in
All is you
You are all
All with you
You in all
I want to live
I don't want to die
I want to live
I want to try
"So it's all very obtuse, because it's all, like, I don't know. So, like, I started thinking that everything I operate on is based on what I believe God was telling me to do. God could be my intuition or whatever, but I always assume, I always assume that the voice I hear is the voice of God. Then I started thinking, what if I'm insane? So I'm operating on the premise that I'm hearing the voice of God or what I perceive to be God speaking to me or through me, but maybe I'm completely in...so all my...demagoguery in my life about me thinking that my life has importance, my, my...thinking that my life has importance. My--my--my thought of it and the fact that I believe I'm following my intuition which in and of itself may be completely false. So then I started freaking out, thinking--of itself may be completely false. And again this creature that believes he's acting upon heavenly intuition but meanwhile he's totally rampant. And I started thinking maybe this is the cause of all the negativity against--and I started thinking maybe this is the cause of all the negativity against--and I started thinking maybe this is the cause of all the negativity against..."
So meets the final coda of a vinyl storm
One more cherry cola to lift up her dead arms
A dream of soft focus, sunsets filters through the din
We are losing contact as she dials it in
She can hear glass calling, or is it someone that looks like him?
She eyes TV reflection, and nods a knowing look
She says it doesn't matter, she never liked her looks
I have seen a thousand fractures, I have seen everything
'Cause knowing is its own answer, love something in a book
There's not much left to ponder, not much left to cook
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
As she counted the spiders, as they crawled up inside her
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