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Vlad the Impaler Lyrics
Chorus:
Vlad, Vlad, Vlad the impaler
Vlad, Vlad, He could have been a sailor but he's
Vlad, Vlad, Vlad the impaler
Vlad, Vlad, He could have been a Whaler
could have been a Tailor,
He turned out to be Norman Mailer
Whoaaoo
He stepped back and he smoked a joint
Twenty thousand peasants had to get the point
Mommy was a hamster, Daddy was a jailer
Real tough childhood for such a fucking failure
(chorus)
He's so glad he's Vlad
When he was a boy, they sent him to the Turks
But you know they didn't like him
because all the Turks were jerks
When Vlad returned home his wrath
for his ancient foe had spurned
But the ancient art of impalement
was something that the boy had learned
Oh, how he learned
He learned, they burned and burned and burned
Rotisseries of corpses turned
He's so glad, oh he's so glad he's Vlad
Vlad, Vlad, Vlad the impaler
Vlad, Vlad, He could have been a sailor but he's
Vlad, Vlad, Vlad the impaler
Vlad, Vlad, He could have been a Whaler
could have been a Tailor,
He turned out to be Norman Mailer
Twenty thousand peasants had to get the point
Mommy was a hamster, Daddy was a jailer
Real tough childhood for such a fucking failure
When he was a boy, they sent him to the Turks
But you know they didn't like him
because all the Turks were jerks
When Vlad returned home his wrath
for his ancient foe had spurned
But the ancient art of impalement
was something that the boy had learned
He learned, they burned and burned and burned
Rotisseries of corpses turned
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just incase there is someone out there who isn't aware, this song is about vlad tepes (aka vlad the impaler, aka vlad dracul (dracula)) which bram stoker based the dracula character on.
Just in case you didn't know. Dracula is his name because the suffix -a means "son of". Dracul means Dragon. So Dracula means "Son of the Dragon". You are right in everything though.
I've also seen the title of this song written as "Vlap the Impaler". Does the album cover have a typo or is this intentional? Anyone know?