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Cosmik Debris Lyrics

The Mystery Man came over
An' he said: "I'm outa-site!"
He said, for a nominal service charge,
I could reach Nirvana t'nite
If I was ready, willing 'n able
To pay him his regular fee
He would drop all the rest of his pressing affairs
And devote his attention to me
But I said . . .
Look here brother,
Who you jivin' with that Cozmik Debris?
(Now who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?)
Look here brother,
Don't you waste your time on me

The Mystery Man got nervous
An' he fidget around a bit
He reached in the pocket of his Mystery Robe
An' he whipped out a shaving kit
Now, I thought it was a razor
An' a can of foamin' goo
But he told me right then when the top popped open
There was nothin' his box won't do
With the oil of Afro-dytee
An' the dust of the Grand Wazoo
He said:
"You might not believe this, little fella, but it'll cure your Asthma too!"
An' I said . . .
Look here brother,
Who you jivin' with that Cozmik Debris?
(Now what kind of a guru are you anyway?)
Look here brother,
Don't you waste your time on me
Don't waste yer time . . .

I've got troubles of my own, I said
An' you can't help me out
So take your meditations an' your preparations
An' ram it up yer snout
"BUT I GOT A CRYSTAL BALL!," he said
An' held it to the light
So I snatched it
All away from him
An' I showed him how to do it right
I wrapped a newspaper 'round my head
So it looked like I was "deep"
I said some Mumbo Jumbos then
An' told him he was goin' to sleep
I robbed his rings
And his pocket watch
And everything else I found
I had that sucker hypnotized
He couldn't even make a sound
I proceeded to tell him his future then
As long as he was hanging around,
I said
"The price of meat has just gone up
An' yer ol' lady has just gone down . . . "
Look here brother,
Who you jivin' with that Cozmik Debris?
(Now is that a real poncho or is that a Sears poncho?)
Don't you know,
You could make more money as a butcher,
So don't you waste your time on me
(Don't waste it, don't waste your time on me . . . )
Ohm shonty, ohm shonty, ohm shonty-ohm
SSHONTAY
12 Meanings
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I gotta say it could be about either. It is all up to interpretation, which is how Frank would want it to be anyway. Think for yourself!

IMO I've always heard it as a anti-drug song. Being against drugs myself its the best, coolest anthem for being sober ever.

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i dunno but i think that this song is making fun of religion?

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He is talking about the meta-physical gurus of the 70's not drug use, that kind of stuff didnt do anything for atheist frank and he told them all off.

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Actually, Gimpy Jim has it right. Despite popular beleif, Zappa was very much against any and all drugs.

The Cosmik Debris are the drugs, cosmik like psychedelic far out etc.

"He said, for a nominal service charge, I could reach nervonna t'nite"

For a little money, he could purchase some drugs and get so high he'd fee like he was in nirvana from the drug enduced pleasure.

The shaving kit was more than likely heroin, as that's how most people carried that stuff (see the movie "Ray" for example)

It's basically Zappa saying that all the dealers that saw him as such a far out musician thought he was some kind of druggie and thought they could make some money selling him drugs should look to do business elsewhere, because he's above such things.

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no way incinerate is right its obviously about maharishi and those 70s gurus - especially the part about the crystal ball and devoting attention to me etc

Zappa hated drugs but theres no way he was self-righteous enough to right a song about how he was too good for them

Punctuation: it is your friend.

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That whole line about a real poncho or a Sears poncho is also in "Camarillo Brillo" on the album "Over-Nite Sensation." Just thought that was a fun thing worth noting.

Zappa is always doing that. From song to song and LP to LP. (ie) Zircon encrusted tweezers, character of Suzi Cream cheese and "poodle chews it" from OVERNITE to APOSTROPHE....

What is your Conceptual Continuity?

@ferret111 Also, the "Grand Wazoo!"

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It's about both. Criticism of drug use for spiritual purposes.

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I love this song. I think it's about the guru's but I don't think it couldn't be about drugs. I don't understand the meat joke though. I kind of get it but I don't think I really get it, especially the later butcher reference.

"The price of meat has just gone up, an' yer ol' lady has just gone down..." I think he's inferring that the guru's "ol' lady" is a prostitute.

The butcher reference, I think, is separate from the meat joke, though. A guru is a Hindu teacher. Most devout Hindu's don't eat meat, because of their belief in reincarnation. So, apparently the speaker is inferring that the guru is incompetent, in a very insulting manner.

@pezdel It is also about tyrants, perhaps, or swindlers who would be violent criminals if they had more "courage."

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A guru/shaman/dealer offers a quick and easy way to nirvana/healing/solve your problems, probably referencing psychedelic drugs ("expand your mind man"). The references to spirituality are probably meant to include the religious versions of this as well. Either way it's a guy offering a simple solution to complicated problems in exchange for money.

Frank "does it right" and hypnotizes the guy, steals his things, and tells him the price of meat is going up so he should be a butcher (or something like that). This is how Frank interprets what the Mystery Man does, but he takes the bullshit out and just robs him plain.

Song Meaning

@bennjammin Right, Frank is the true "Mystery man."

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No, it's an anti-drug song. Frank was opposed to that.... The guy trys to sell him drugs from his shaving kit:

He said, for a nominal service charge, I could reach nervonna t'nite If I was ready, willing 'n able To pay him his regular fee

"There was nothin' his box won't do With the oil of Afro-dytee An' the dust of the Grand Wazoo He said: "You might not believe this, little fella, but it'll cure your Asthma too!" frank tells him to get bent, takes his crystal ball and robs him.

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