I'll tell you why I
Don't wanna know where you are
I gotta joke I've been dying to tell you
Silent kid is looking
Down the barrel
To make the noise that I kept so quiet
Kept it from you, Pitseleh

I'm not what's missing
From your life now
I could never be the puzzle pieces
They say that God makes problems
Just to see what you can stand
Before you do as the Devil pleases
Give up the thing you love

But no one deserves it

The first time I saw you
I knew it would never last
I'm not half what I wish I was
I'm so angry
I don't think it'll ever pass
And I was bad news for you just because
I never meant to hurt you


Lyrics submitted by EnjOy IncUbus

Pitseleh Lyrics as written by Steven Paul Smith

Lyrics © Universal Music Publishing Group, O/B/O DistroKid

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Pitseleh song meanings
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106 Comments

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  • +10
    General Comment

    I think many on here miss the point of this song. He wasn't in love with this girl. She was in love with him. He might have loved her struggle to love him but now he wanted her to release him.

    He doesn't care where she's been to me is about him not being as into her as she is and possibly avoiding their interactions as each takes them one step closer to him breaking her heart. It's a reaction to the recent times she's asked him why he doesn't care where she's been and who she's been with. Classic girlfriend "prove you like me" behavior.

    The answer to her question is this song. The irony of women is that she'd probably fall for him and see more hope if she read these lyrics.

    The fact is that "no one deserves this". "This" is what he's gonna have to do to her. He's been avoiding it.

    Also, I think too many people miss that most of his lyrics often mean many things at the same time. I think there are themes in this song that aren't just about his "little one" and their relationship. It also touches on his own desires to end himself (possibly a loosely connected commentary on the fact that she's not filling him or curing him or helping him) and his view of evil winning out in all things "before you do as the devil pleases".

    She's a spent of time that's needing to end cause he'll just sit in misery forever but she needs to move on because she wants more than that.

    That's my take. But as always. I'm late to the party.

    Last note: The song itself is haunting and beatiful in a way that only his music can be.

    planks13on April 07, 2009   Link
  • +5
    General Comment

    " i'll tell you why i don't want to know where you are i got a joke i been dying to tell you "

    one time i heard a joke i knew my old friend would appreciate but then it hit me that she won't talk to me anymore, and i can't tell her it. love...loss.

    colossal_youthon January 04, 2005   Link
  • +5
    General Comment

    It's interesting that some people view this as an optimistic song. I personally think it's a song as a suicide note. It seems to be about a bad relationship and total despair following the breakup. I think he's had suicidal tendencies for a while but hadn't told Pitseleh.

    The_Jackalon January 18, 2005   Link
  • +4
    General Comment

    Pitseleh is a beautifully sad song - I can hear the fragility of Elliot Smith oozing out in this song. Pitseleh is apparantly a yiddish word meaning "little one" so it is a term of endearment in this song. Obviously he is regretting losing someone he loved, but seemingly someone he had to convince to love him back. Seems like a love that was doomed from the start, but Elliot doesn't seem ready to change who he is to suit her. He realizes that he is wrought with holes, but that's just who he is.

    tubesockson July 07, 2002   Link
  • +4
    General Comment

    I think this song is sung to Elliott from both his mother and stepfather, who apparently abused both of them. He is the silent kid looking down the barrel, watching his mom getting hurt. She doesn't want to know where he is because then he is ia witness or a victim. And she has been trying not to cry, to not show him how bad it is, but Elliott/Pitseleh is crying, he knows exactly what is going on. But then later, when he sings the last verse, he is addressing it to someone he wants to love, but knowing what he has lived through, he will be bad news for her. He often spoke about being abused and started a foundation for abused kids, and left his mother's house to go live with his father because of his stepfather. Really, I guess, it is about self-awareness, and understanding, as an adult, what the repercussions of a bad childhood are.

    suburbangirlon October 31, 2007   Link
  • +3
    General Comment

    I love the part of the songs where he sings "but no one deserves this" and the piano comes in oh god i can't even explain the feeling i get when that happens its just amazing i fuckin worship elliott smith

    AWalkDownAlamedaon January 15, 2005   Link
  • +3
    General Comment

    He would always call this song "long and boring"

    jasminepon July 03, 2008   Link
  • +3
    General Comment

    maybe his most pathetic and depressing song and maybe my favorite

    efleezleon September 21, 2008   Link
  • +3
    Song Meaning

    The first verse does not mean suicide... Elliot was molested by his stepfather when he was a child The line "I got a joke I been dying to tell you" is relating to the last line of the first verse "I kept it from you, Pitseleh" pitseleh is yidish for little one... but it also has a slang in yiddish meaning small penis. So knowing that he was molested and the slang of pitseleh the barrel he is referring to is probably the penis of either him or his stepfather. The joke is a very sad joke.

    vorea26on December 04, 2010   Link
  • +2
    General Comment

    It's a stunning song but i can't see it optimistically. The lines 'i'm not half what i wish i was, i'm so angry, i don't think it'll ever pass' are brutally honest but there's real despair in those words.

    worseforthewearon April 14, 2004   Link

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