Some static started in the pool hall
Hit a motherfucker's face with the cue ball
Then I met this girl she tried to gank me
So I smacked her in the pootie with a Plank, B
'Cause me and my crew were out breaking windows
The bingo, the lotto you know I'll never win those
Possession is half the law
I had my routines before all y'all
Your whole life is coming apart at the seams
You ain't nothing but a car thief biting routines
See, I'm a city slicker I ain't no townie
Right now I wish I had another hash brownie
Like Ricky always said you've got to toke and pass
Or Mookie's gonna kick your fuckin' ass
You try to take what isn't yours like a God damn rat
See, personally I wouldn't wanna go out like that

I'm a writer, a poet, a genius, I know it
I don't buy cheeba I grow it
People always trying to get next to me
I had a beautiful experience on ecstasy
I Smoked up a bag of elephant tranquilizer
Because I had to deal with a money-hungry miser
Had a 'caine-filled Kool with my man Rush Rush
Saw my teeth fall in the sink when I started to brush
You be doing nose candy on the Bowie coke mirror
My girl asked for some but I pretended not to hear her
You can't deny me, you always want to try me
Yo, you're just gonna get your ass kicked
Homeboy throw in the towel
Your girl got dicked by Ricky Powell
The Godfather of Soul in the belly of the beast
Smoking that dust at St. Anthony's Feast

All the wife beaters and all the tax cheaters
Sitting in the White House pulling their peters
Buy my cheeba from the cop down the street
The only cop with a rope chain walking the beat
So like a sneaky pouch time bomb tickin'
Or like the beat to my rhyme just kickin'
Space cake cookies I discover who I am
I'm a dusted old bummy hurdy-gurdy man
Five-O caught me now I'm going to the mountains
Said good-bye to my girl, my lawyers and accountants
My mind is kinda rhymin' and I think I oughta think
So I'm rockin' all the rhymes and I'll have another drink
So the lights are flashing, my mind is spinning
I feel like it is always the beginning
Of another rhyme I'm rapping, M.C-ing I rock
You ain't nothing but a car thief who must be stopped


Lyrics submitted by shut

Car Thief Lyrics as written by Adam Nathaniel Yauch Adam Horovitz

Lyrics © BMG Rights Management, Universal Music Publishing Group

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Car Thief song meanings
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6 Comments

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  • +1
    General Comment

    haha i just love this song. beasties kick ass

    Brass Monkeyon May 31, 2004   Link
  • +1
    General Comment

    Easily the best Beastie Boys song ever...

    ....and that's saying something!

    D4MVPon March 11, 2006   Link
  • +1
    General Comment

    Definately the best Beastie's track off their best album.

    Ricky being Rick Rubin of course.

    Omnicideon March 19, 2006   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    This is one of the greatest Beastie Boys songs out there. It's about a night someone (or they?) had while on drugs. It's hard to understand what this song really means. My guess is maybe a car thief stole their car that was full of drugs/money? I listen to it for the flow of the words and the imagery that you can portray in your mind with the music it delivers.

    tyrowjameson September 15, 2005   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    i love how they used the sample of the jackson five's i'll bet you

    MacGon November 27, 2007   Link
  • 0
    General Comment

    I'm not exactly sure which is my favorite Beastie song, but Car Thief certainly comes to mind when asked. It's the perfect example of how great the Beasties are. It's an album track, not a single. Easily the best song on Paul's Boutique.

    Mushmouth Joeon June 25, 2012   Link

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