Tea And Sympathy

i have to disagree because in england, the term for "tea and sympathy" usually refers to a casual act between friends or family to those that need mere company during a time of trial or sadness...

tea and sympathy refers to that time spent together, a casual get-to-gether when one is giving sympathy to the one who is heartbroken.

this song is staged at a place exactly where you might go for tea and sympathy- a restaurant, and the waitress is someone who's very experienced with other people walking in doing just that- having casual conversation with one person giving sympathy while the other is heartbroken.

what the singer is trying to suggest is that he doesn't want their love to grow into the type of relationship where they only meet to talk of trivial things, conversations where the girl speaks of meaningless things- that's why her words fall to the floor like china cups...there's just no substance in them and they're love has faded into some friendship with casual conversation...

it's like when you break up with someone you really love, and afterwards, your relationship sometimes ends up being bland, "bitter", and all the things you've said in the past, all the dreams and "castles" you've planned were left unattained.

in the end, he's pleading to save their love...their relationship, for something more passionate and real than just bland casual friendship with empty words and sympathetic gestures. he reassures her "we can work it out" meaning to continue their romantic relationship and not trading it in for some 'hey, how you doing these days' type relationships...

The "tea" in this song refers to things said between two people who love each other. Some of the words are harsh and misunderstood, and "fall to the floor and break like china cups", whereas some of them are calmly and carefully spoken, "slowly dr[u]nk in". The waitress tries to clean up the broken words, and later offers sugar. They taste the "bitterness" of the words spoken, and the waitress offers sugar to sweeten the "tea" -- meaning they need to "sweeten" the words.

This all might sound silly, but they've put a lot of analogies into the song. The waitress represents a kind of common sense -- trying to fix the mistake of using harsh words, and trying to find better words to use. The tea represents the words being spoken, and the bag of leaves represents those not yet said (not yet mixed).

whoa, japhy. Right on. How on earth did you know all that??

way to go japhy, i understand it so much better. thanks!

has anyone thought of this song talkin about a relationship with god and in this relationship the person has been goin thro a bad time and god mad at god and said some bad things and is tryin to make up?

doesnt sound that way, i think this is a more people-related song rather than the usual God-related ones jarzzy usually play. :)

marchesa,

the way you explaned it just makes the song more clear to me. I agree with what you said.

Thanks-a-lot!

This song is about someone who leaves a church because they are more focussed on their own need for attention to their lament. The exquisite rendering depicts a brother sitting down to hear the reasons this person can no longer be among the precious brothers and sisters. The singer is the brother singing about this person. The Holy Spirit is the 'waitress.' listen to it like this and it will blow your socks off! :)

How about applying the death of a child (perhaps to war) to these lyrics as a plea from the parent not to be shut out by the other:

Fare thee well = as in goodbye and be well (maybe to the child) Trade in all our words = there’s nothing to be said (to their spouse) For tea and sympathy = let’s just sit and be together

wonder why we tried for things = to change the course of life/to protect their child could never be = fate play our heart's lament = feel and mourn our sorrow like an unrehearsed symphony = the loss of a child isn’t something you can truly prepare for

not intent to leave this castle full of empty rooms = a home that a child will never return to is hard to leave, even for a cup of tea our love the captive in the tower = what do you do in a tower — you look out and wait for someone — their love is now captive in the tower, looking and waiting never rescued = for a child who will never come and all the victory songs seemed to be playing out of tune = wars are won.....for a cost to some.... at a cost to others

cause it's not the way that it has to be= we lost our child, let’s not lose each other don't trade our love for tea and sympathy, no = there’s still us, let’s not shut each other out -it’s ok to feel happiness and love for each other no, it's not the way that it has to be

you begin = the other spouse is trying to breakthrough and all your words fall to the floor = the feelings of love for their child and the years shared can’t be conveyed with mere words and break like China cups = (china cups are fragile and valuable) the words spoken resurface the loss and the waitress = someone unconnected, on the outside, grabs a broom = “grabs”(not gets)/rushes — as in grabbing a towel versus getting a towel when something spills and tries= because you really can’t to sweep them up = an effort — usually futile to make it better I reach for my tea, slowly drink in = some sorrow you learn to live with, to incorporate it into who you are

cause it's not the way that it has to be don't trade our love for tea and sympathy, no and, it's not the way that it has to be don't trade our love for tea and sympathy

fare thee well = again trying to find a way to say goodbye and be well (to the child) the words, the bag of leaves that fill my head (all the feelings, all the years that memory captures) I could taste the bitterness = choice to isolate, be angry, curse fate and call the waitress instead = but chooses to reaches out — to a meaningless stranger no less cuz she holds the answer, smiles = who it may be revealed knows the pain of losing a child too and asks one teaspoon or two = symbolic for a friend today, perhaps tomorrow too

don't trade us for tea and sympathy = don’t give up don't trade us for tea and sympathy we can work it out = we will find our way don't trade us for tea and sympathy don't trade us for tea and sympathy we can work it out we can work it out

ok you guys, this is a tough one. i have no clue on this one, i've known this song forever, but i've never figured it out. so please help me out!