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The Ballad of Simon Diamond Lyrics

Simon Diamond sold his soul
Changed his name by deed poll
Started out as Simon Russell
Lived his life inside a nutshell

He couldn't take the public scorn
Changed from human to plant form
Now he's swapped his legs for roots
His arms and soil are in cahoots

What will become of Simon Diamond
He can water himself
But can't change the climate

That'll do
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