Just Being Honest

Last week I saw you in the lobby passing through
You said "Hey! How ya doing?"
I said "Pretty good, and you?"
Well that wanst true
I was actually doing pretty bad
Having just heard some unfortunate news from my dad
He invested my inheritance in a new business plan
That plan was takin' teens to the prom in a fleet of used mini vans
So at that moment
I didnt really care how you were doing
And I dont remember your name
Thats why I called you man
The other night at midnight you called me on the phone
You asked me if you woke me up and i said no
But the truth is i was in the deepest sleep of my life
Having the most realistic dream i was flying
In the international human flying championship
Your sister was there about to give me a kiss
Thats when you called me
And asked me how to say guhnauchi.
Listen closely: Its Gnocchi
Im just being honest-est-est-est
Ho-ho-ho-honestly? Honesty means that much to me
Ho-ho-ho-honestly? Honesty means that much to me
Much to me
Remember on our most recent romantic night out?
You broke the silence by asking "What're ya thinking about?"
I said "How much i love you!"
But thats not true
I mean, I DO Love you
I just dont think like you do
My brain's a sophisticated department
Of completely disconnected compartments
And at that particular moment I was thinkin' about sports
Last night when I was quiet you asked me "Whats wrong?"
I looked into your eyes and said "Nothing at all!"
Thats not exactly true, im actually startin' to resent you
And the work you pour into your taxidermy petting zoo
You havent called me pookie pie in over 4 months!
Do you wanna preserve us or this dead Dove?
Im just being honest-est-est-est
Ho-ho-ho-honestly? Honesty means that much to me
Ho-ho-ho-honestly? Honesty means that much to me
Much to me
The day before yesterday, you pulled me over and
Asked "Do you have any idea how fast you were goin?"
I said "Oh, No officer. I didnt even see ya"
But I did see you and I was going 72
And for full disclosure my right speaker was blown
And for the preceding 10 miles my left blinker was on!
I had no intention of ever turning left
You may recall I gave a testimonial for your product
I said "The face-cave in no way makes me look idiotic"
I feel like im in a cave even though im not really in a cave
Because the only thing in the cave is my face
To tell you the truth, face caves are hostile!
Unless you really like stalagmites up your nostrils!
You know your terms and conditions agreement?
When I was updating my software: I didnt read it!
Im just being honest-est-est-est
Ho-ho-ho-honestly? Honesty means that much to me
Ho-ho-ho-honestly? Honesty means that much to me
Much to me