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Woke in a sweat
What I can’t forget, and what I’ll never ask to
Tell me that I’m something that you just don’t know
Tell me that I’m somewhere you don’t want to go
Tell me that I’m some place you don’t want to know
Like the back of your hand
I don’t understand
Undone, disarmed
Well I don’t know and you don’t mind
This time there’s no time
Well I don’t know and you don’t mind
Deep inside of the day, anyone else would fall in your arms
But I do not
Do I, do I, do I want that
I was something that you just couldn’t feel
I was something that you couldn’t feel that was real
I believed you when you shut your eyes and dreamed a dream without me
Mmmmmmmmm
Sometimes I don’t think about you
Hmmmmmmmm
Sometimes I don’t think about it
Oh oh
Tears are falling in the underground
Falling into thoughts that turn to colours
The colours are the colours of my thoughts and they’re painting you
Sometimes I live my own life, my own life
What I can’t forget, and what I’ll never ask to
Tell me that I’m somewhere you don’t want to go
Tell me that I’m some place you don’t want to know
Like the back of your hand
I don’t understand
Well I don’t know and you don’t mind
Well I don’t know and you don’t mind
But I do not
Do I, do I, do I want that
I was something that you couldn’t feel that was real
I believed you when you shut your eyes and dreamed a dream without me
Mmmmmmmmm
Hmmmmmmmm
Oh oh
Falling into thoughts that turn to colours
The colours are the colours of my thoughts and they’re painting you
Sometimes I live my own life, my own life
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From Sharon herself:
"This is a song I've tried in different contexts and the only way it ever feels real to me is just as a straight-up band song. I tried a minimal version that just wasn't working. I love it as a song, it just never came together in the studio. But as I got to know my new band we started playing B-sides and outtakes at live shows to keep it fresh for us and for returning fans. I can't think of any other way to do this song now. Just the live energy of it, it just makes sense. It has this natural momentum that's hard to create in a studio environment.
"I wrote this toward the end of recording Tramp, so it did overlap with [the 2014 album Are We There?] some. It's still a love song and has that drawn out narrative I do. I wrote it during one of the 'off periods' with the person who Are We There is centered around. We were off and on for so long that it was one of those times where I really didn't understand, 'Are we in a relationship? Do you want this to happen? You're not communicating with me.' Because of my work I fall off the face of the earth for a while. But as a person he'd fall off the face of the earth for a while. But whenever we were together we had so much fun. I felt we both challenged each other. I just don't know why he could never be completely open with me. And I was frustrated as hell."
http://www.npr.org/sections/allsongs/2015/06/01/407058268/sharon-van-etten-explains-the-heartbreak-behind-her-new-ep-track-by-track
Prefer the demo version