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Archibald Aspen Lyrics

Archibald Aspen
The world-famous cop
Didn't quite set out to be

Promoted within
From his job taking fingerprints
When they caught wind of his
Photographic memory

Known 'cross the Earth
But fame to him's worthless
Worth less than the shoes on his feet

He'd rather live quaint
Sculpt and paint
But he needs the paycheck for his family

Then one night
On his route
Saw two men
Sneaking out
Of an abandoned factory door

They saw each others' face
And knew if they escaped
They'd be tracked down tomorrow for sure

And with a blow to the head
Archibald fell to the floor

Archibald Aspen
Has one only son
Born on New Year's Day

Millennium Aspen
Is now ten years old
His little league team
Calls him "Aspen2k"

His mother comes home
And she calls for Millennium
Tells him she has some bad news

His dad's disappeared
And everyone fears
That he's lying somewhere
Beaten, battered, and bruised

All at once, Millennium jumps
And he swears it's time to attack
He says "mark my words
I'll search and I'll search
'Till I bring my father back"

Miss Aspen she smiles
Pats her son on the back
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