Tenenbaum

Happy 2016. I'm not sure why nobody has commented on this song yet... why is this?

Tenenbaum is absolutely heart-wrenching. For me personally, the song is an absolute master-piece, THE song I have been waiting for all my life, to describe my life, and I would dare to say that I am very well experienced in all corners of music; very ranged, very different... but this one hits the bone.

I understand from watching the official music video that most people accept this piece as a father missing his daughter, who has unfortunately travelled down the road of prostitution, and his pain is prominent, but Tenenbaum's beauty lies in its ambiguity.

The song radiates universal pain, be it losing a daughter, a friend, a family member, or a lover, or even the one who got away. It's all relevant, and just as important. In my instance, it was my ex-girlfriend throughout university in the UK.

The context: I was in a 5 year relationship with her throughout the whole of uni. She was the perfect girlfriend. I fucked up through alcohol. I regret it. Deeply.

I hope others can relate to this, but here goes.....:

"You're a bitter kind I love you so"

In a relationship, you put up with all your lover's hardships and troubles, no matter how terrible anyone might say otherwise. You're willing to put up with it all for your love.

"Sour is my mind From what you sow How I let it grow"

Sour: from her reasonable comments of you getting constantly and ridiculously drunk; I was too stubborn to give shit, and the cycle of getting drunk and waing up sour/feeling shit.

Call them radiant, call them mothers eyes Home's a narrow space for me to find

Radiant. Her personality was radiant, couldn't wish for any better in a human. My university progress, career, family, and relationship prospects, headed completely off-course. F-ing regret.

Your beguiling state and endless heights I'm just not moving right Just not moving right when it's just not you

"Under neon lights Where I wake I'm not feeling right So they say Rough kind of a day."

Wake up absolutely.goddamn.wasted. At least twice a week. She is a hard-working girl, anyone would sense the disappointment in that.

Don my clothing, robes of ageing white Rattled windows on the old green line

Ageing white reminds me of my sleeping T-Shirts she used to sleep in for bed. Ageing means they're getting old, the nights out of me getting drunk are getting old, shes sick of it..

Do you feel it like I hope you might I'm just not seeing right Just not seeing right when it's just not you

This is what hits me most. I have been through depression, but that has always been the answer to why I have always acted how I did. I got drunk because of previous experiences in my life. I wanted her, or anyone, to feel how I did. Why? I don't know, perhaps I wanted some love when I didn't receive it at that time.

"Just not feeling right". In the same time I'm selfish..., she just broke up with me, so please feel the pain I feel... but then again, I'm not feeling right since my last experience, it's a selfish call for sympathy.. but she will never understand why I crave the attention..

Again, these are my thought. It's totally situational... I'm perhaps hyper-sensitive but who knows.... been 3 years since this song was put out here on this site, I'm surprised.. If this relates to you, do get in touch, or learn about me on my website... :) Good luck if you feel this way, you will recover, time is your only enemy. Stay tough.

https://lightscameracaptions.wordpress.com/

My mistake, I missed out this section...

Your beguiling state and endless heights I'm just not moving right Just not moving right when it's just not you

Beguiling state..: 2 feelings:

1. She once said to me once "My biggest regret with you... I wish I didn't break up with you sooner...". She put up with me all these years.
2. more in the sense she put up with my bullshit. She was a soldier, I was the country's rebel. Disastrous.

Feel the same? Get in contact... ^ Would love to help if you have a life question :) Will try my best from my own experiences.