Gauntlet Of The Will

But I love the pain and I’m drawn to harm as I drag my wounded self along.
In this time I long for so much more.
Yet it seems as though I cannot reach a time of clarity as if fighting this
bloody battle in the midst of the fog.
You liar, you coward, you wretched beast, you are the deceiver you backstabbing
whore.
Come at me face to face; you will not because you cannot, for it is known that
you are not that what you wish.
O’ God do you see, is this all my own terrible mind?
I am sorry for the things I have done, for my flesh is weak and I am on my
face.
I feel like the filth that I really am, for this is a terrible curse.
In my day I know that I seem to run from You, but please know that I cannot
look You in the eye, as Your child I feel so small.
You liar, you coward, you wretched beast, you are the deceiver you backstabbing
whore.
And so I must go and hide my filth.
Why am I made up in such a way, why must I go through this gauntlet of the
will?
O’ God do you see my frustration?
[This song is about how much of a coward Satan is and how he attacks the
weaknesses of believers.]