Shaving Cream

I have a sad story to tell you
It may hurt your feelings a bit
Last night I went into my bathroom
And I stepped in a big pile of shhhh-
hhhaving cream
Be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen
Here we are in this fine yuppie coffee joint
I hate to be picking a nit
But hey, dude, I orded coffee latte supreme
And you brought me a cup full of shhhhh-
hhaving cream
Be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen
The runningback takes a handoff from the quarterback
He gets a block, OOH what a hit!
He's out in the clear
He's going all the way
OH! he trips on a big pile of shhhh-
hhhaving cream
Be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen
I went swimming in the Atlantic Ocean
I thought that I'd cool off a bit
But accidently, I swallowed some water
Let me tell you it tasted like shhhhh-
hhhaving cream
Be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen
Our cars make a lot of pollution
Makes the air hard to breathe, I'll admit
Just think if we all still rode horses
All our streets would be knee-deep in shhhh-
hhhaving cream
Be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen
And now folks, my song it has ended
I think it is time I should quit.
If any of you feel offended
Stuck your head in a bucket of shhhhh-
hhhaving cream
Be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen.