Reasons to Be Miserable

Reasons to be miserable
Give my brain a pain;
Very little turns me on,
Marvin is my name.
I'm a robot, it's my lot,
A robot full of cares;
I'd feel a little better
If they broke me up for spares.
Everything I say or do
I find the world condemning,
If I had my time again
I'd rather be a lemming.
I'm just a menial robot.
Oh well.
They drive me crazy with their:
"Marvin close the door"
Well isn't enough to make you ---
"Tidy up the floor"
You know it spoils a robot's day.
"Marvin when you've finished,
You can put yourself away."
I'm going to flip my lid,
They treat me like a kid.
Robot naughty, robot bad,
Robot happy, robot sad,
Who's a clever robot lad?
It would drive a human mad.
Robots are inhuman,
Robots are inhuman,
Human robots are in.
Human robots are in.
I get no satisfaction.
I'm bored.
Can't bear these humans when they
Make me do their work,
I'd rather be a calculator.
Treat me like a jerk,
Ha ha ha that'll be the day.
Pat me on the head,
I'd rather be a percolator:
It'd be no trouble
Just to bubble life away.
Don't get a holiday,
Or friends to stay.
How can a robot think
With his elbows in the sink?
Marvin peel a grape (Marvin)
Is there no escape? (Marvin)
Marvin dig a hole (Marvin)
Play some rock 'n' roll (Marvin).
Yeah, dig it.
I really hate it when they
Underload my brain,
Washing up the dirty dishes;
Diodes give me pain,
Walking dogs and feeding fishes,
Driving me insane.
Just a metal slave is what a robot is
And always... will remain.