Dear Thomas

Dear Thomas, I'm writing tonight
Just to say that I hope you're all right;
I haven't heard from you since I went away,
I was sorry to go, but you said not to stay,
So I went to the station and boarded a bus for tomorrow.
Dear Thomas, did you ever know
I was praying you'd say not to go?
Were you really that blind to the hope in my eyes,
Was my love that unclear, was my heart that unwise?
I paid for my ticket with tears, and my change came in sorrow,
And the signs at the station all read "you can never go home."
You can never go home to the land that you loved
When you thought that a day was forever;
When the wind was a bridle to hang on the sun
And the moon was a toy on a tether.
I can never go home to the girl that I was
When I thought you might tell me to stay,
'cause the past is a road where the bus doesn't run,
And there's no station called "Yesterday."
Dear Thomas, I wish I could lie
And pretend that this wasn't goodbye...
But I can't live my life on a wish and a prayer,
I was reaching for you, but you never were there,
So I packed up my bags and I went to where you couldn't follow.
Dear Thomas, I'll always be yours,
But the past is a room with no doors.
There's no second chance, no, there's only regrets
And the ghost of a heart that's not quite broken yet.
I'd sign this with love, but we both know the words would be hollow,
And the signs at the station were right: I can never go home.
You can never go home to the land that you loved
When you thought that a day was forever;
When the wind was a bridle to hang on the sun
And the moon was a toy on a tether.
I can never go home to the girl that I was,
So it's time that I put her away,
'cause your heart is a road where the bus doesn't run,
And there's no station called "Yesterday."
And the signs at the station were right: I can never go home.
And the signs at the station were right. We can never go home.
Written on: 2007-03-01. Seanan McGuire