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New Friend Jesus Lyrics
Everybody's saying that the lights don't shine
But the lights shine down on me
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
I met him in the parking lot
He took me in his car
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
We rode around all afternoon
He sold me his guitar
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
Now people give me sideways looks
When we set up on the strand
But it's hard to suck with Jesus in your band
I wish I was with Jesus when I met you
I wish I was with Jesus when I met you
I wish I was with Jesus when I met you
You'd be so impressed with me
You'd give yourself right up to me
Everybody's saying that it's way too warm
But me, I feel a chill
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
When all those creeps came after me
He paid off all my bills
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
We drove around all summer long
We parked behind the bars
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
People say we suck at sports
But they don't understand
It's hard to catch with holes right through your hands
I wish I was with Jesus when you loved me
I wish I was with Jesus when you loved me
I wish I was with Jesus when you loved me
I would have been a better me
That much I can guarantee
Now I'm on your doorstep and you're asking me to leave
You say you don't believe I could ever change so quickly
You say you'll call the cops but even if you do
I'll just love them all the way that Jesus loves me
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
But the lights shine down on me
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
He took me in his car
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
He sold me his guitar
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
When we set up on the strand
But it's hard to suck with Jesus in your band
I wish I was with Jesus when I met you
I wish I was with Jesus when I met you
You'd be so impressed with me
You'd give yourself right up to me
But me, I feel a chill
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
He paid off all my bills
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
We parked behind the bars
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
But they don't understand
It's hard to catch with holes right through your hands
I wish I was with Jesus when you loved me
I wish I was with Jesus when you loved me
I would have been a better me
That much I can guarantee
You say you don't believe I could ever change so quickly
You say you'll call the cops but even if you do
I'll just love them all the way that Jesus loves me
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
I've got a new friend and my new friend's name is Jesus
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The narrator of this song might be the guy from When No One's Watching. Maybe not, but he's the same kind of scumbag.
He's one of those people that's found Jesus, and seems to think it makes him invincible and great at everything, but this is obviously not true from the context of lines like, "You'd be so impressed with me/You'd give yourself right up to me." He doesn't use his Christianity to be a better person, but as a signal that he's a better person. He's still a piece of shit, which is why she's calling the cops and asking him to leave.
Delightfully ironic song, although "It's hard to catch with holes right through our hands" is a pretty cringeworthy line.
"People say we suck at sports but they don't understand It's hard to catch with holes right through your hands"
This is most likely a reference to his alma mater, Boston College, which is a jesuit college.