Kill for Love

this is such a beautiful song .

i think of it with my idea of this narrator reciting her faults (being undisciplined and depressed, and not taking most things in life very seriously) and expressing her general feeling that everybody else is in the same boat with her, low-level misery being default way of living.

when she says, "i killed for love" she sounds proud of herself. "killing" is a such a violent word, i don't imagine that her 'love' went particularly well. but she's happy it was one thing she did genuinely, "giving it her all."

This is a really deep song and hits close to home for me.

I think "killing for love" means when you kill who you really are to be with someone you love.

You adapt to what the person wants you to be. You "drink the water" even if you don't want to, you "take a pill" for the emotional pain the situation is causing you, you wait for the person to change and accept you. You say things ("I can't remember if I liked what I said") they want to hear, you behave like a fool, you drink and take drugs if you have to, and even if it's hurting, you put a pillow on the top of your head to forget the world and the suffering. You do whatever it takes only to be accepted by them.

You kill your real self for their love. To get their love.

I don't necessarily think this song is about love in the romantic sense—the references to pills, keeping bottles by the bed, putting the pillow over the head, all read like references to substance abuse, and possibly even suicide given that they are in past tense. They "killed" for love, or something like it, but they killed themselves.

In either case, it seems to me to be a reflection on some sort of self-abuse.

Love is hunger. Everyone needs love. You can hardly survive mentally and emotionally without love. People are desperate for love. Babies die without it. Soe becomes severely depressed so they resort to "pills" She drank the "water" otherwise known as alcohol to soothe her misery. But none of those things helped. The world went on without her. Nothing had changed in her life. She is so desperate that she "killed for love." by trying to find some source of the rescue of her emotions.