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Never Coming Home (Song for the Guilty) Lyrics
The trains roll by my porch
Down here where nothing can live
And I've been smoking too much
Because I am no exception
You knew that already, I think
If you want salvation
Then you ought to go see a priest
'Cause forgiveness from those that we hurt
In this world never was guaranteed
I'm coming home, it's late again
I'm high as I've ever been
You're sitting up, you're in our bed
Crying for a ghost again
No room could be as dark
Or as empty as ours is
'Cause I'm at home but I'm not here
And I never am
I wonder how many friends
Roll past my house in the night?
In boxcars they sleep
With hearts stashed in their backpacks
They'll make California all right
A promise from me
Is just a lie I ain't told yet
So I'm ready to die
But I'm not willing to watch
You watch me die here in our bed
I'm lying down, I've been nodding out
Since I don't know when
The lights are on, you're standing up
Screaming at a ghost again
Darling, I'm home; hell I ain't left
This house of ours in days
But I'm not here; I never am
So I just can't stay
My darling, I'm never coming back
From where I'm going
My darling, I'm never coming home
My darling, I'm never coming back
From where I'm going
My darling, I'm never coming home
Never coming home again
Down here where nothing can live
And I've been smoking too much
Because I am no exception
You knew that already, I think
If you want salvation
Then you ought to go see a priest
'Cause forgiveness from those that we hurt
In this world never was guaranteed
I'm coming home, it's late again
I'm high as I've ever been
You're sitting up, you're in our bed
Crying for a ghost again
No room could be as dark
Or as empty as ours is
'Cause I'm at home but I'm not here
And I never am
I wonder how many friends
Roll past my house in the night?
In boxcars they sleep
With hearts stashed in their backpacks
They'll make California all right
A promise from me
Is just a lie I ain't told yet
So I'm ready to die
But I'm not willing to watch
You watch me die here in our bed
I'm lying down, I've been nodding out
Since I don't know when
The lights are on, you're standing up
Screaming at a ghost again
Darling, I'm home; hell I ain't left
This house of ours in days
But I'm not here; I never am
So I just can't stay
My darling, I'm never coming back
From where I'm going
My darling, I'm never coming home
My darling, I'm never coming back
From where I'm going
My darling, I'm never coming home
Never coming home again
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This one hits hard, because I have days when this song is relatable.
"You're sitting up, you're in our bed, crying for a ghost again" and "The lights are on, you're standing up, screaming at a ghost again" - Meaning his partner is sad and angry, but he's saying that he isn't really there. He's dead, even if he's alive, he's not there.
"So I'm ready to die, but I'm not willing to watch. You watch me die here in our bed." - He wants to die, but he doesn't want to kill himself. So he just stays in bed and doesn't do anything.
"Darling, I'm home; hell, I ain't left this house of ours in days. But I'm not home, I never am, so I just can't stay" and "My darling, I'm never coming back from where I'm going. My darling, I'm never coming home, never coming home again." - He is saying he's there physically, but not mentally. He's committed to his decision to die, and knows there's no coming back.