Busiest Shopping Day of the Year

So the other day at the Whit(?)
There's this guy, I think his name's Paris
I guess his parents thought he should be, uh, cultural
So he goes 'is this real butter?'
He sticks his finger in it then he goes
'Make sure this is real butter, take it back to the cook.'
And I said 'of course it's butter motherfucker.'
I bring it back, he sticks his finger in it and he goes
'Yeah but are you sure it's real butter?'
And I go, 'I saw you in the paper the other day
You know what you are?
You're a wife beater'
So I see this article, in the paper
I think it's called 'A Woman Hysterical'
And yeah, sure as shit, there's his name
Saw him on the freeway, these witnesses
Uh, beating the shit out of his wife
Mr Butter Batter I Can't Believe It's Not Butter Motherfucker
Telling me to check the butter while he's uh, thinking about beating his wife
Those SUVs, SOBs
You know the type
They come in and it's all the same
Well he beats us up
He came back again
He came back one more time
And he said, 'oh, you're so special!'
And I said, 'I'm special, I'm special, like brass in pocket.'
I'll show you brass in
I'll show you,
I'll show you brass in pocket
I'll show you