Cheaper To Keep Her

I asked her what she wanted this year for our anniversary,
She thought about it long and hard
and then she said to me.
"I'd really like a divorce,
I think I've finally had enough."
I said, "Honey I wasn't planning on spending quite that much."
Well it's cheaper to keep her than it is to let her go,
Just can't bear to say goodbye to half of everything I own.
Well I'm damned if I do
and damned if I don't.
Well its cheaper to keep her than it is to let her go.
She handed me some papers that she wanted me to sign,
she pulled out a pen and pointed at that dotted line.
It's not the thought of losing her
that really breaks my heart.
You see, I'm in love with all my stuff
and that's the hardest part.
Well it's cheaper to keep her than it is to let her go,
Just can't bear to say goodbye to half of everything I own.
Well I'm damned if I do
and damned if I don't.
Well its cheaper to keep her than it is to let her go.
I started thinking about it,
adding it up.
The house, the boat, the car, the truck,
when I see my attorney gonna kick his butt
for talking me out of that damned prenupt.
Well it's cheaper to keep her than it is to let her go,
Just can't bear to say goodbye to half of everything I own.
Well I'm damned if I do
and damned if I don't.
Well its cheaper to keep her than it is to let her go.