Both as a standalone and as part of the DSOTS album, you can take this lyric as read. As a matter of public record, Jourgensen's drug intake was legendary even in the 1980s. By the late 90s, in his own words, he was grappling with massive addiction issues and had lost almost everything: friends, spouse, money and had nearly died more than once. "Dark Side of the Spoon" is a both funny & sad title for an album made by a musical genius who was losing the plot; and this song is a message to his fans & friends saying he knows it. It's painful to listen to so I'm glad the "Keith Richards of industrial metals" wised up and cleaned up. Well done sir.
Y:
Heigh ho!
Do you know,
The names of the US residents
Who then became the Presidents
And got a view from the White House loo
Of Pennsylvania Avenue
George Washington was the first, you see
He once chopped down a cherry tree
D:President number two would be
John Adams and then number three
Y:Tom Jefferson stayed up to write
The Constitution late at night
So he and his wife had a great big fight
And she made him sleep on the couch all night
W:James Madison never had a son
then he fought the War of 1812
D:James Monroe's colossal nose
Was bigger than Pinnochio's
Y:John Quincy Adams was number six
And it's Andrew Jackson's butt he kicked
So Jackson learns to play politics
Next time he's the one that the country picks
D:Martin Van Buren number eight
For a one term shot as chief of state
Y:William Harrison, how do you praise
That guy was dead in thirty days!
W:John Tyler he liked country folk
D:And after him came President Polk
Y:Zachary Taylor liked to smoke
His breath killed friends whenever he spoke
W:1850, really nifty
Millard Fillmore's in
Y:Young and fierce was Franklin Pierce
The man without a chin
D: Follows next a period spannin'
Four long years with James Buchanan
Then the South start shootin' cannon
And we've got a civil war
YW&D:A war!
A war down south in Dixie!
Y:Up to bat comes old Abe Lincoln
D:There's a guy who's really thinkin'
W:Kept the United States from shrinking
Saved the ship of state from sinking
D:Andrew Johnson's next
He had some slight defects
W: Congress each
Would impeach
D:And so the county now elects
Y: Ulysses Simpson Grant
Who would scream and rave and rant
W: While drinking whiskey
Although risky
Cause he'd spill it on his pants
Y: It's 1877 and the democrats would gloat
But they're all amazed when Rutherford Hayes
Wins by just one vote
D:James Garfield, someone really hated
Cause he was assasinated
W:Chester Arthur gets instated
Four years later he was traded
D:For Grover Cleveland, really fat
Elected twice as a Democrat
Then Benjamin Harrison after that
It's William McKinley up at bat
Y:Teddy Roosevelt charged up San Juan Hill
W:And President Taft he got the bill
Y:In 1913 Woodrow
YW&D: Wiiilllllllson
Takes us into World War One
Y:Warren Harding he does fine
D:It's Calvin Coolidge next in line
W: And then in 1929
The market crashes and we find
Y:It's Herbert Hoover's big debut
He gets the blame and loses to
D:Franklin Roosevelt, president who
Helped us win in World War Two
W:Harry Truman, weird little human
Serves two terms and when he's done
Y:It's Eisenhower who's got the power
From '53 to '61
D:John F. Kennedy, he gets shot
So Lyndon Johnson takes his spot
Y:Richard Nixon he gets caught
And Gerald Ford fell down a lot
W:Jimmy Carter liked campaign trips
Y:And Ronald Reagan's speeches' scripts
All came from famous movie clips
And President Bush said "read my lips"
D:Now in Washington, D.C.
W:It's Democrats and the G.O.P.
Y:But the one in charge is plain to see
D:It's Clinton, first name Hillary
Y: The next President to lead the way
Well, it just might be yourself one day
Then the press'll distort everything you say
YW&D:So jump in your plane and fly away
Heigh ho!
Do you know,
The names of the US residents
Who then became the Presidents
And got a view from the White House loo
Of Pennsylvania Avenue
George Washington was the first, you see
He once chopped down a cherry tree
D:President number two would be
John Adams and then number three
Y:Tom Jefferson stayed up to write
The Constitution late at night
So he and his wife had a great big fight
And she made him sleep on the couch all night
W:James Madison never had a son
then he fought the War of 1812
D:James Monroe's colossal nose
Was bigger than Pinnochio's
Y:John Quincy Adams was number six
And it's Andrew Jackson's butt he kicked
So Jackson learns to play politics
Next time he's the one that the country picks
D:Martin Van Buren number eight
For a one term shot as chief of state
Y:William Harrison, how do you praise
That guy was dead in thirty days!
W:John Tyler he liked country folk
D:And after him came President Polk
Y:Zachary Taylor liked to smoke
His breath killed friends whenever he spoke
W:1850, really nifty
Millard Fillmore's in
Y:Young and fierce was Franklin Pierce
The man without a chin
D: Follows next a period spannin'
Four long years with James Buchanan
Then the South start shootin' cannon
And we've got a civil war
YW&D:A war!
A war down south in Dixie!
Y:Up to bat comes old Abe Lincoln
D:There's a guy who's really thinkin'
W:Kept the United States from shrinking
Saved the ship of state from sinking
D:Andrew Johnson's next
He had some slight defects
W: Congress each
Would impeach
D:And so the county now elects
Y: Ulysses Simpson Grant
Who would scream and rave and rant
W: While drinking whiskey
Although risky
Cause he'd spill it on his pants
Y: It's 1877 and the democrats would gloat
But they're all amazed when Rutherford Hayes
Wins by just one vote
D:James Garfield, someone really hated
Cause he was assasinated
W:Chester Arthur gets instated
Four years later he was traded
D:For Grover Cleveland, really fat
Elected twice as a Democrat
Then Benjamin Harrison after that
It's William McKinley up at bat
Y:Teddy Roosevelt charged up San Juan Hill
W:And President Taft he got the bill
Y:In 1913 Woodrow
YW&D: Wiiilllllllson
Takes us into World War One
Y:Warren Harding he does fine
D:It's Calvin Coolidge next in line
W: And then in 1929
The market crashes and we find
Y:It's Herbert Hoover's big debut
He gets the blame and loses to
D:Franklin Roosevelt, president who
Helped us win in World War Two
W:Harry Truman, weird little human
Serves two terms and when he's done
Y:It's Eisenhower who's got the power
From '53 to '61
D:John F. Kennedy, he gets shot
So Lyndon Johnson takes his spot
Y:Richard Nixon he gets caught
And Gerald Ford fell down a lot
W:Jimmy Carter liked campaign trips
Y:And Ronald Reagan's speeches' scripts
All came from famous movie clips
And President Bush said "read my lips"
D:Now in Washington, D.C.
W:It's Democrats and the G.O.P.
Y:But the one in charge is plain to see
D:It's Clinton, first name Hillary
Y: The next President to lead the way
Well, it just might be yourself one day
Then the press'll distort everything you say
YW&D:So jump in your plane and fly away
Lyrics submitted by Sophic
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It's "a Declaration", not "the Constitution"