Well, in my opinion this song is about being a young & maybe a little naive &/or introverted girl and finding yourself loving a man who is at first very charming, carefree & outgoing, and seems at first to be without limits, as in
"There was a time
you opened up every doorway
you didn't mind if everything
wasn't your way"
then that man starts to gradually become more introverted & shows their more possessive/obsessive side to you as the relationship progresses, even while they keep up the appearance of being carefree & outgoing to everyone else,
"Don't pull away
that goes against what you told me
I look in your eyes
I realize what you've sold me
is love in a vacuum"
so you confront them about the way they're acting and of course they deny it,
"I think you've changed
but you insist that
that's not true"
quite possibly they are an addict of some sort, my guess would be cocaine, &/or showing very obsessive behavior towards you (early on in the video for this song we see the man hanging a picture up, it is a very large portrait of Aimee & it is prominently displayed in his/their apartment for the duration of the song), thus their "love in a vacuum",
"You look so strange, so distant
that you're hardly you
Now I can see
how you have been acting different
You say it's me
but I know
that it isn't
it's love in a vacuum"
but still you are in love with them and don't want to leave them and you know that they are truly in love with you and they don't want you to leave them either, maybe they are convinced you can save them from themself, maybe they are so broken that the possibility of an overdose &/or suicide attempt is very real and you want to get through to them that their behavior not only dangerous but it is also just pissing you off and if they don't wise up they run the risk of loosing you, as in the lines
"You will be lonely
if you leave me alone", so you want to save them but can't get through to them due to the addiction &/or emotional problems they have,
"Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
love in a vacuum
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
You will be lonely
if you leave me alone
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough"
you want them to understand that the love they are giving you is not enough when it is filtered through the vacuum of their drug addiction &/or emotional impairment,
"You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough
and just wait
you will be lonely
Love in a vacuum
Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
Love in a vacuum".
'Love In A Vacuum' for me is a hauntingly truthful acute argument on the loneliness of obsession and almost inevitable loss of love that follows people who are broken in some way or another; the obsessives, the coke heads, the drunks, addicts or the just-plain-old emotionally broken; a razor sharp, lyrically driven, deceptively poppy, yet ultimately-depressing-in-the-best-way song.
Quintessential Aimee Mann.
You've got them all, by the balls
causin' waterfalls
Stone walls
Bar brawls
Common stalls that cause 'em all
To you they crawl, body sprawl
Smokin' Pall Malls
Close call, stand tall
Doll, you make them feel so small
And they love it!
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
I wanna be her
Yes I do
The way you rock, don't stop (or lone star)
Girl, you got the chops
Flip flop
She bop
Self-taught
You lick so hot
Are you conceived
Kids receive
Crawling up the sleeve
Parents bleed
Can't conceive
That indeed we'll never leave
And we love it!
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
I wanna be her
So do you
[Repeats]
Listen up
Listen up
Listen up
Voices scatter
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
Scatter
The Boys
The Girls
Scatter
The Boys
The Girls
Scatter
The Boys
The Girls
Scatter
The Boys
The Girls
causin' waterfalls
Stone walls
Bar brawls
Common stalls that cause 'em all
To you they crawl, body sprawl
Smokin' Pall Malls
Close call, stand tall
Doll, you make them feel so small
And they love it!
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
I wanna be her
Yes I do
The way you rock, don't stop (or lone star)
Girl, you got the chops
Flip flop
She bop
Self-taught
You lick so hot
Are you conceived
Kids receive
Crawling up the sleeve
Parents bleed
Can't conceive
That indeed we'll never leave
And we love it!
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
The girls wanna be her (The girls)
The boys wanna be her (The boys)
I wanna be her
So do you
[Repeats]
Listen up
Listen up
Listen up
Voices scatter
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
The girls wanna be her (scatter)
The boys wanna be her
Scatter
The Boys
The Girls
Scatter
The Boys
The Girls
Scatter
The Boys
The Girls
Scatter
The Boys
The Girls
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He reuses the verse melody from the previous album's "Dirty Little Religion", the topics of the verses are all over the place, and he packs too many words into one line (goes to show...) and too few in another (it's pretty hard to find), and rhymes "Henley Regatta" with "Persona non grata", but gets away with it all as only he could.
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This song is def a twin to "Unfair" (a song she has been quoted as saying is about falling in love with someone who is already in a relationship) so it is presumably about the same person. Given the references to buying an apartment and not being able to see her love interest "after tonight," it's most likely that she's moving away and she'll "wait a day to break the bad news" (i.e. notifying him that she's leaving once she's already gone).
And, of course, the fact that she sees in him a fellow "idealist" and "dreamer" (terms commonly given to people with the INFP personality on the Myers–Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI)) portends that she'll always be left wondering if they would've been perfect together.
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Both as a standalone and as part of the DSOTS album, you can take this lyric as read. As a matter of public record, Jourgensen's drug intake was legendary even in the 1980s. By the late 90s, in his own words, he was grappling with massive addiction issues and had lost almost everything: friends, spouse, money and had nearly died more than once. "Dark Side of the Spoon" is a both funny & sad title for an album made by a musical genius who was losing the plot; and this song is a message to his fans & friends saying he knows it. It's painful to listen to so I'm glad the "Keith Richards of industrial metals" wised up and cleaned up. Well done sir.
Its about a woman who is such a strong, independant, sexy woman that all the girls want to be like her, and because she's strong and independant even the boys want to be like her too.
I love this song, "You're looking very Shane today." ;) For anybody who knows what i'm talking about, this song was used in that sequence.