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I Don't Sleep Well Lyrics
And suddenly, I don’t feel fat anymore
I don’t count my blackheads as a hobby
I don’t count the marks on the wall
And I don’t sleep well at all
There is someone else right beside me
He kept every secret I told
He giggled his way straight to fall
And I don’t sleep well at all
He knows when I’m happy and nods when I’m sad
And he puts out when I come home drunk
And suddenly I stand real tall
But I don’t sleep well at all
I have seen too many movies
I have read - I read too many books
I’m the kind that sees sun and brings an umbrella
I have been to fortune tellers
And I know love will leave you all crooked
And I know he’ll start sleeping around
Or start listening to symphony rock
Or throw out the key and change the lock
But I don’t sleep well at all
I don’t count my blackheads as a hobby
I don’t count the marks on the wall
And I don’t sleep well at all
He kept every secret I told
He giggled his way straight to fall
And I don’t sleep well at all
And he puts out when I come home drunk
And suddenly I stand real tall
But I don’t sleep well at all
I have read - I read too many books
I’m the kind that sees sun and brings an umbrella
I have been to fortune tellers
And I know he’ll start sleeping around
Or start listening to symphony rock
Or throw out the key and change the lock
But I don’t sleep well at all
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I think it's about being with someone who you're no longer into. She's lost her insecurity about being fat because she doesn't care what he thinks.
"There's someone else right beside me, he's kept every secret I've told; he giggled his way straight through Fall..."
She's with a decent man who doesn't excite her. He's a bit of a goof. She doesn't respect him. She's going to break him by the end of the song.
"He knows when I'm happy and nods when I'm sad, and he puts out when I come home drunk."
He is kind to her and puts up with her dysfunction. She's not getting better.
The next stanza, I think, is her feeling like she has no choice to leave him bc she has romantized love. She wants more. She's read too many movies and books about how amazing love can be. She's been to fortune tellers bc she wants to know if she's making a mistake by leaving him.
The last stanza feels to me like her coping with how she's ruined her ex's life. Love will leave him crooked. He's going to start sleeping around or maybe become a loner listening to symphony rock. He'll never talk to her again. But what can she do? She's unhappy. She's not sleeping well.
This song hit me so hard.
For me it is about the lack of letting go of your fears and commiting to a new love because you think it will end bad anyway. The inability to be happy due to a lack of trust and hope. The inability to live in the moment.