Fix You

My best friend and I have both been suicidal in the past, and fairly recently, she lost one of her other friends to suicide. This song brought her through it. One night, at about 3 in the morning, we were texting each other. It was the one year anniversary of the day her friend died and she was feeling terrible. We made a promise to each other that night that neither of us would commit suicide. I was listening to this song at the time, and we made it a symbol of our promise. Tears were definitely streaming down our faces.

To me, the beginning is basically a list. It's a bunch of reasons why life can go to crap. "When you try your best but you don't succeed / When you get what you want but not what you need / When you're so tired but you can't sleep". Then "Stuck in reverse" is implying depression and feeling generally down and suicidal.

Then it gets to "When the tears come streaming down your face". This is clear-you are in such a terrible place that you can't hold in the tears anymore. "When you lose something you can't replace". This was my best friend's friend, who committed suicide. That's the line that's hers. "When you love someone but it goes to waste". This one is mine. I've loved the same guy for almost two years now, but he doesn't know it because I won't tell him. I don't want to ruin our friendship, however one-sided it may seem. So my love for him goes to waste, because I get nothing out of it. "Could it be worse?" This is the thought that is running through your head when you are about to grab the gun.

"Lights will guide you home / And ignite your bones / And I will try to fix you". The "lights" is the promise that we remind one another of, and it reaches deep into our bones. Then if one of us is down and considering suicide again, the other will do everything in their power to help, or "fix" the one considering suicide.

"High above or down below". This is my friend wondering if her friend who committed suicide is in heaven or in hell. "When you're too in love to let it go". This is me with the guy I love too much. "If you never try you'll never know / Just what you're worth". If one of us kept our thoughts to ourself about our worth or the value of our life, then the other would never be able to tell the suicidal one just how valuable they are.

"Tears come streaming down your face". Every time this is stated, it is reminding us of a suicidal state. "When you lose something you can't replace". You can't replace a person. You can't replace your love. "I promise you I will learn from all my mistakes". A reminder that the other has also considered suicide, and it is a mistake and nothing more. It is never an option. Then it ends on the chorus, reminding that we are always there for one another.