Well, in my opinion this song is about being a young & maybe a little naive &/or introverted girl and finding yourself loving a man who is at first very charming, carefree & outgoing, and seems at first to be without limits, as in
"There was a time
you opened up every doorway
you didn't mind if everything
wasn't your way"
then that man starts to gradually become more introverted & shows their more possessive/obsessive side to you as the relationship progresses, even while they keep up the appearance of being carefree & outgoing to everyone else,
"Don't pull away
that goes against what you told me
I look in your eyes
I realize what you've sold me
is love in a vacuum"
so you confront them about the way they're acting and of course they deny it,
"I think you've changed
but you insist that
that's not true"
quite possibly they are an addict of some sort, my guess would be cocaine, &/or showing very obsessive behavior towards you (early on in the video for this song we see the man hanging a picture up, it is a very large portrait of Aimee & it is prominently displayed in his/their apartment for the duration of the song), thus their "love in a vacuum",
"You look so strange, so distant
that you're hardly you
Now I can see
how you have been acting different
You say it's me
but I know
that it isn't
it's love in a vacuum"
but still you are in love with them and don't want to leave them and you know that they are truly in love with you and they don't want you to leave them either, maybe they are convinced you can save them from themself, maybe they are so broken that the possibility of an overdose &/or suicide attempt is very real and you want to get through to them that their behavior not only dangerous but it is also just pissing you off and if they don't wise up they run the risk of loosing you, as in the lines
"You will be lonely
if you leave me alone", so you want to save them but can't get through to them due to the addiction &/or emotional problems they have,
"Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
love in a vacuum
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
You will be lonely
if you leave me alone
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough"
you want them to understand that the love they are giving you is not enough when it is filtered through the vacuum of their drug addiction &/or emotional impairment,
"You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough
and just wait
you will be lonely
Love in a vacuum
Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
Love in a vacuum".
'Love In A Vacuum' for me is a hauntingly truthful acute argument on the loneliness of obsession and almost inevitable loss of love that follows people who are broken in some way or another; the obsessives, the coke heads, the drunks, addicts or the just-plain-old emotionally broken; a razor sharp, lyrically driven, deceptively poppy, yet ultimately-depressing-in-the-best-way song.
Quintessential Aimee Mann.
The phone slips from a loose grip
Words were missed then, some apology
"I didn't want to tell you this
No, it's just some guy she's been hangin' out with
I don't know, the past couple weeks, I guess"
Well, thank you and hang up the phone
Let the funeral start, hear the casket close
Let's pin split-black ribbons to our overcoats
Well, laughter pours from under doors
In this house, I don't understand that sound no more
It seems artificial, like a TV set
Well, haligh, haligh, a lie, haligh
This weight, it must be satisfied
You offer only one reply
You know not what you do
But you tear and tear your hair from roots
From that same head you have twice removed
A lock of hair you said would prove
Our love would never die
Well, ha ha ha
And I remember everything
The words we spoke on freezing South Street
And all those mornings watching you get ready for school
You combed your hair inside the mirror
The one you painted blue and glued with jewelry tears
Something 'bout those bright colors
Would always make you feel better
But now we speak with ruined tongues
The words we say aren't meant for anyone
Just a mumbled sentence to a passing acquaintance
But there was once you
You said you hate my suffering
You understood, you'd take care of me
You'd always be there
Where are you now?
Haligh, haligh, a lie, haligh
The plans were never finalized
But left to hang like yarn and twine
Dangling before my eyes
As you tear and tear your hair from roots
From that same head you have twice removed
A lock of hair you said would prove
Our love would never die
And I sing and sing of awful things
The pleasure that my sadness brings
As my fingers press against the strings
Another clumsy chord
Haligh, haligh, an awful lie
This weight will now be satisfied
I'm gonna give you only one reply
I know not who I am
But I talk in the mirror
To the stranger that appears
Our conversations are circles
Always one sided, nothing is clear
Except we keep coming back
To this meaning that I lack
He says the choices were given
Now you must live them, or just not live
But do you want that?
Words were missed then, some apology
"I didn't want to tell you this
No, it's just some guy she's been hangin' out with
I don't know, the past couple weeks, I guess"
Well, thank you and hang up the phone
Let the funeral start, hear the casket close
Let's pin split-black ribbons to our overcoats
Well, laughter pours from under doors
In this house, I don't understand that sound no more
It seems artificial, like a TV set
Well, haligh, haligh, a lie, haligh
This weight, it must be satisfied
You offer only one reply
You know not what you do
But you tear and tear your hair from roots
From that same head you have twice removed
A lock of hair you said would prove
Our love would never die
Well, ha ha ha
And I remember everything
The words we spoke on freezing South Street
And all those mornings watching you get ready for school
You combed your hair inside the mirror
The one you painted blue and glued with jewelry tears
Something 'bout those bright colors
Would always make you feel better
But now we speak with ruined tongues
The words we say aren't meant for anyone
Just a mumbled sentence to a passing acquaintance
But there was once you
You said you hate my suffering
You understood, you'd take care of me
You'd always be there
Where are you now?
Haligh, haligh, a lie, haligh
The plans were never finalized
But left to hang like yarn and twine
Dangling before my eyes
As you tear and tear your hair from roots
From that same head you have twice removed
A lock of hair you said would prove
Our love would never die
And I sing and sing of awful things
The pleasure that my sadness brings
As my fingers press against the strings
Another clumsy chord
Haligh, haligh, an awful lie
This weight will now be satisfied
I'm gonna give you only one reply
I know not who I am
But I talk in the mirror
To the stranger that appears
Our conversations are circles
Always one sided, nothing is clear
Except we keep coming back
To this meaning that I lack
He says the choices were given
Now you must live them, or just not live
But do you want that?
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its amazing how far music can come.. 24 years after it released and its one of the most heartfelt songs ive heard
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Warren wanted a Beach Boys thing for this one, and Carl Wilson and Billy Hinsche came in, with Carl arranging the vocal parts. The other harmony vocalists (credited as the "Gentlemen Boys") were Jackson Browne, J.D. Souther, Zevon's longtime backers Waddy Wachtel and Jorge Calderon, and Linda Rondstadt/Stone Poneys guitarist Kenny Edwards.
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The way this song speaks to me🥺🥺when I sing it I feel like I relate
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I think your first comment is closer to being accurate. The singer/song writers state "Millions of eyes can see, yet why am i so blind!? When the someone else is me, its unkind its unkind". I believe hes referring to the girl toying with him and using him. He wants something deeper with her, thats why he allows himself to be as a puppet (even though for her fun and games) as long as it makes her happy. But he knows deep down that she doesnt really want to be serious with him and thats what makes him.
I enjoy the sounds of this music