Datura

"Datura" by Tori Amos came to me at a very difficult time. Odd thing is, four years prior, one of my best friends in New York City had often pontificated on how important this song was to him - but I neither took note of why nor really showed any interest in why. At the time I heard "Datura", I was sitting outside of a church waiting for my mother, very down and out, having just returned from a rather dark and scary four-month period in San Francisco: my boyfriend had left me and moved back to our hometown Hollywood in Florida; I had gotten raped twice; I had become highly addicted to Crystal Meth; and was quite persecuted and beaten down by a lot of people in San Fran. When "Datura" hit my ears, the first thing that struck me was the riff just before or after the one minute mark on the song: it was...hm...transcendent: I looked around me, stared at the sifting cars, the people walking by, the sky blue, vast and omniscient and it felt like I saw myself, life and God all at once (and no, I wasn't high). Music does that to you: regardless of the lyrics or the varying meanings that can be read in a song, it's the music...where it takes you...what it evokes from you...that's important. And of course, when I heard the lyrics:

Is there room in my heart For you to follow your heart And not need more blood From the tip of your star

I realized this song was not talking about the drug Datura, or just about Tori's garden - no, it was talking about me, my love for myself, my love for others, and my love for that thing that I and all of creation (as a whole) creates: joy, truth, love and GOD.

To me, this song has always been about survival. It's about persisting, staying strong when you have the most reason to give up. No matter how badly you are torn apart, there is still that fire within, everything still alive and flourishing inside of you (represented in the song by the plants).

"I was in a mood that day. . . . We were supposed to be cutting something else, and it wasn't coming together. Matt [Matt Chamberlain] was running around, but the band hadn't shown up yet -- meaning Caton [Steve Caton] and Jon [Jon Evans] hadn't come. And I just had this thing about my garden. I got a list from my gardener about everything that was in my garden that was still alive."

"...I'm talking about the times when lines have been crossed by men. Men can be dangerous, like in the song Datura about how sometimes they can bring you gold and sometimes they can be the bearer of poison. The plant Datura is a hallucinogen and it's like men. If you get the right amount you'll walk into the garden and become a woman, but if too much seeps in in the wrong way and at the wrong time - it'll kill you."

"'Datura' is this plant that if you put too many leaves in to steep--even though it does have altered-state potential in a big way, like bella donna--if you don't steep it correctly, I hope you like to fly . . ." [Tori; Tower Records' Pulse Magazine, Nov99]

Tori's garden sounds amazing.

It's always amazing for me, reading other people interpretations, because it then always changes what I think of a song, how I picture it and whether it still sounds beautiful. Still beautiful to me.

what an absolute power-song

I love this song...it sounds strange but if you\'re in the right mood for it, it\'s perfect. I think it\'s quite clear what it\'s about. The line \"Is there room in my heart/for you to follow your heart\" means to me, that you\'re not sure if it\'s safe to let somebody else into your heart...can you trust the person? do you have room for him/her?

"Is there room in my heart / For you to follow your heart / And not need more blood / From the tip of your star" Can I find it in me to let you chase your passion and to not take out my feeling of abandonment on your dreams, to not sabotage your dreams becoming to life

This video is my response to the song, and I think Tori would approve.

youtube.com/watch