Well, in my opinion this song is about being a young & maybe a little naive &/or introverted girl and finding yourself loving a man who is at first very charming, carefree & outgoing, and seems at first to be without limits, as in
"There was a time
you opened up every doorway
you didn't mind if everything
wasn't your way"
then that man starts to gradually become more introverted & shows their more possessive/obsessive side to you as the relationship progresses, even while they keep up the appearance of being carefree & outgoing to everyone else,
"Don't pull away
that goes against what you told me
I look in your eyes
I realize what you've sold me
is love in a vacuum"
so you confront them about the way they're acting and of course they deny it,
"I think you've changed
but you insist that
that's not true"
quite possibly they are an addict of some sort, my guess would be cocaine, &/or showing very obsessive behavior towards you (early on in the video for this song we see the man hanging a picture up, it is a very large portrait of Aimee & it is prominently displayed in his/their apartment for the duration of the song), thus their "love in a vacuum",
"You look so strange, so distant
that you're hardly you
Now I can see
how you have been acting different
You say it's me
but I know
that it isn't
it's love in a vacuum"
but still you are in love with them and don't want to leave them and you know that they are truly in love with you and they don't want you to leave them either, maybe they are convinced you can save them from themself, maybe they are so broken that the possibility of an overdose &/or suicide attempt is very real and you want to get through to them that their behavior not only dangerous but it is also just pissing you off and if they don't wise up they run the risk of loosing you, as in the lines
"You will be lonely
if you leave me alone", so you want to save them but can't get through to them due to the addiction &/or emotional problems they have,
"Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
love in a vacuum
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
You will be lonely
if you leave me alone
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough"
you want them to understand that the love they are giving you is not enough when it is filtered through the vacuum of their drug addiction &/or emotional impairment,
"You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough
and just wait
you will be lonely
Love in a vacuum
Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
Love in a vacuum".
'Love In A Vacuum' for me is a hauntingly truthful acute argument on the loneliness of obsession and almost inevitable loss of love that follows people who are broken in some way or another; the obsessives, the coke heads, the drunks, addicts or the just-plain-old emotionally broken; a razor sharp, lyrically driven, deceptively poppy, yet ultimately-depressing-in-the-best-way song.
Quintessential Aimee Mann.
My little demon, comin' on down
My little demon's turnin' me around
All of my friends all tellin' me
That I just ain't the man I used to be
I really don't like it
Ain't nothing I can do
I really don't like it
I'm leaving it to you
My little demon, making me choose
Making me an offer I can't refuse
Hard as a rock, dry as a bone
Big or little, know that I will take you home
I really don't like it
Ain't nothing I can do
I really don't like it
I'm leaving it to you
Why try to hide it?
Fight it, fight it
I really don't like it
Ain't nothing I can do
I really don't like it
I'm leaving it to you
My little demon
Is coming after me
My little demon
It's all that I can do
To keep that little demon
To keep that little demon
Just to keep that little demon
Away from you
One, two
One, two, three
My little demon's turnin' me around
All of my friends all tellin' me
That I just ain't the man I used to be
I really don't like it
Ain't nothing I can do
I really don't like it
I'm leaving it to you
My little demon, making me choose
Making me an offer I can't refuse
Hard as a rock, dry as a bone
Big or little, know that I will take you home
I really don't like it
Ain't nothing I can do
I really don't like it
I'm leaving it to you
Why try to hide it?
Fight it, fight it
I really don't like it
Ain't nothing I can do
I really don't like it
I'm leaving it to you
My little demon
Is coming after me
My little demon
It's all that I can do
To keep that little demon
To keep that little demon
Just to keep that little demon
Away from you
One, two
One, two, three
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Warren wanted a Beach Boys thing for this one, and Carl Wilson and Billy Hinsche came in, with Carl arranging the vocal parts. The other harmony vocalists (credited as the "Gentlemen Boys") were Jackson Browne, J.D. Souther, Zevon's longtime backers Waddy Wachtel and Jorge Calderon, and Linda Rondstadt/Stone Poneys guitarist Kenny Edwards.
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Like a lot of the other comments are saying, I think this mainly about voyeurism. If the song was about his girlfriend, then why would he use the word spy. If you are a spy it means you shouldn't be caught, that is kind of the whole point, and if you are a voyeur, the whole point of the pleasure you get from it, is the fact that the other people don't know you are watching them. See a bit of a connection there?
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The way this song speaks to me🥺🥺when I sing it I feel like I relate
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In regards to the meaning of this song:
Before a live performance on the EP Five Stories Falling, Geoff states “It’s about the last time I went to visit my grandmother in Columbus, and I saw that she was dying and it was the last time I was going to see her. It is about realizing how young you are, but how quickly you can go.”
That’s the thing about Geoff and his sublime poetry, you think it’s about one thing, but really it’s about something entirely different. But the lyrics are still universal and omnipresent, ubiquitous, even. So relatable. That’s one thing I love about this band. I also love their live performances, raw energy and Geoff’s beautiful, imperfectly perfect vocals. His voice soothes my aching soul.
This song is about the 'inner demons' that we all struggle with through our day-to-day lives. It's a really positive song with a great message. Also, it seems to be quite likely about drug addiction and the fight to resist.