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The Painter Lyrics
I'd like you to meet my last queen,
Over there large as life
She's been hanging there for almost a week,
My poor late wife;
What do think of the colour of her skin,
It has the bloom of a rose,
You see she begged me to bring a certain painter in,
And for that picture in her bedroom she would pose;
Well after a while he was driving me mad,
As you could well understand,
Sitting in there, day after day,
With my wife in the palm of his hand...
It was -
"Madam please do this and Madam please do that",
You've never heard such display,
But he didn't mind he was taking his time,
It was me that had to pay,
"Oh Madam I think we should take a walk in the woods,
You understand it's the light",
And did I mind, no, I was so kind when they,
Came back in the middle of the night,
And I swear I'll take care of the painter, oh the painter...
Well as you can see it was hard for me,
But something has to be done,
She only has eyes for him and his lies, and as for me,
Not a glance, not a single one;
My orders were severe and she disappeared,
It really was such a shame,
And when they told me she was dead I broke down and said,
"It's that painter, it's him, he's to blame."
With his "Madam please do this and Madam please do that",
You've never heard such display,
But he didn't mind he was taking his time,
It was me that had to pay,
"Oh Madam I think we should take a walk in the woods,
You understand it's the light",
And did I mind, no, I was so kind when they
Came back in the middle of the night,
And I hope it's the rope for the painter,
When he's found, it's hellbound for the painter,
I'll get that painter...
This is about our hero (the rumplestiltskin-esque De Burgh), having another one of his medieval acid trips. He often visualises a demonic painter trying it on with his missus. When actually we already know Chris has her cahined up in his 1350 castle dungeon.
Really? It's awesome. It's that PAINTER! He's to blame!
Chris De Burgh took the basic story from Robert Browning's chilling poem, "My Last Duchess" (1842), in which the (historical) Duke of Ferrara is showing a visitor round his mansion and pauses to draw back a curtain covering the portrait of his deceased wife.
The poem begins with the casual remark, "That’s my last Duchess painted on the wall, / Looking as if she were alive." The Duke then relates basically the story that De Burgh tells, but greatly nuanced, telling how the favour of his young wife's smiles on the painter grew until he could stand it no longer:
"This grew; I gave commands; Then all smiles stopped together. There she stands As if alive."
The Duke and his guest move on, and we find that the visitor's purpose is to discuss the dowry arrangements for the Duke's marriage to "The Count your master’s ... fair daughter’s self". As they walk on out of earshot, the Duke's last words invite the Count's emissary to admire another artwork ...
For the poem, see poetryfoundation.org/poems/43768/my-last-duchess , and for an analysis, see the links below the poem.