| Marillion – Sugar Mice Lyrics | 4 months ago |
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Obviously inspired by Fish's own struggles with family, but the voice in the story is an estranged ex-husband looking back on his life decisions. He has spent a lot of time brooding on how his relationship fell apart ("Trying to piece together conversations / Trying to find out where to lay the blame") but has come to accept over time that it is fundamentally himself that is broken, useless, deserving of blame ("you can blame it on me"). The verse ends with the titular line ("We're just sugar mice in the rain"): A sugar mouse is a small UK candy which would quickly melt to nothing in water. The line is a nihilistic crutch for the character, nothing really ultimately matters, everything is ephemeral, you can blame it on me, whatever, it's not like it means anything. Of course, the central tension of the song is that the ex-husband doesn't really believe that, it's just something to numb the pain. It's implied he now lives above a bar ("I heard Sinatra calling me through the floorboards"), and describes it in melancholy tones that befit his general depression. Ex-husband spends a lot of his time at the bar. He tries to convince himself that it would never have worked, he couldn't have been a good husband and father, it just wasn't for him, he prefers to be on his own, he is a broken person not suited to that life ("'Cause I know what I feel, know what I want I know what I am"). But his thoughts return always to the kids he has abandoned, the cowardly, childish way he left them, as if their upbringing was just an optional event he decided to skip ("Daddy took a raincheck"). Possibly inspired by an event in Fish's own life, the character recalls an uncomfortable call with his children. It brought home the unbearable feeling of guilt. He had assumed his ex-wife would have moved on by now, but finds out it's not the case ("When I heard them asking questions I knew that you were all alone"). He attempts to frame his leaving as an act of sacrifice, better in the long run, he was an unemployed loser not fit to be their father. But even this belies a selfish reason, he just wanted to flee the guilt of being seen as a deadbeat ("I just couldn't stand the looks on their faces saying, "What a jerk"). The song ends in the self-pitying laments of an alcoholic. He will live the rest of his life at the bar, an endless loop of the same thoughts rotating in his head. He meant well, he had good intentions at heart, life dealt him a bad hand ("...broken angel..."). But he knows he is fooling himself ("...clutching at straws..."). His thoughts recur in the same familiar pattern they always do: Blame it on me, Sugar mice in the rain, Daddy took a raincheck... |
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