| Vanessa Carlton – Heroes and Thieves Lyrics | 4 years ago |
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I think this song describes the end and a mental review of a failed relationship. I have just ended a brief relationship with totally the wrong person, and I can't get this song out of my head, it seems totally relevant to my experience. "Heros and Thieves at my door, I can't seem to tell them apart anymore" that was what happened, I got involved romantically with a totally unsuitable person who doesn't share my values. And I am reviewing the situation, I am thinking about it, I want to try and learn from the experience so that it doesn't happen again. So that I don't fall for the wrong type of person again. "Give me a year or two And I'll mend my ways And see these mistakes" I am going through self-help courses, trying to mend my ways so that I can become a psychologically healthy person, or at least more healthy, and then never have to date these crazy mentally unstable types ever again. Incidentally, I am doing Jordan B. Peterson's Self-Authoring course, it's very helpful, I would recommend it to anyone looking to get their life in order. These lyrics also make me keep thinking back to the longest romantic relationship of my life, and how my personal mental problems which manifested as HOARDING, i.e. storing loads and loads of crap around the house, in a compulsive way, this mental problems caused my nice guy lover a lot of stress, and we would always have a serious conversation about it, which would also go the same way: he would tell me "I can't live like this, your hoarding is driving me insane. If you can't do something about it, I'm going to have to break up with you." To which I would always reply: "Yes, you are right, I will stop hoarding, I will make a change" and each time I would really mean it. But ultimately, I could not fix the mental problem, and the poor guy dumped me, after like 5 years together. I am in a situation now where I'm single and that's okay because I am determined to fix my problem before I get involved with anymore romantic adventures. Otherwise, in a new relationship, the same problem would start all over again. This part of the song where she promises "just give me a year or 2" that reminds me a lot of my repeated promises - broken promises - to my ex-lover. You see the reason why she can't tell the difference between good guys and bad guys, is because her internal ideas of right and wrong are not being supported by the way in which she lives. In other words, I feel that the song is about a person who is mentally deranged "I'm stubborn and wrong, But at least I know it" and also "You can't help me". She's struggling with problems in her unconcious mind, of course her lover can't help her, just as my lover couldn't help make overcome my hoarding. And I was always promising "give me a year or 2" and although I really mean it, I always broke the promise. "Well, disaster it strikes on a daily basis I'm looking for wisdom in all the wrong places" This describes perfectly the relationship I just came out of. It was a brief 3 week affair, and that person was trying to set up a toxic-relationship-dynamic with me, in which "disaster it strikes on a daily basis" they were always CREATING drama, always creating a crisis. Why? To distract from the real psychological work which needs to be done on their shadow side. This kind of person was very sexy, very attractive to me, because their mental problems matched my mental problems perfectly. However, I'm too old for this bullshit and now I want a way out, I want a permanent solution, I want to cure my mental disease and stop hoarding and have an awesome relationship with someone who's not mental like me. The only way to do this is to change me, myself and I. By changing myself, I will change the people I am romantically attracted to. No more thieves, just heros. But first I must become my own hero. Redemption is possible. "Well, it seems like I'm getting closer somehow A flicker of peace that I've finally found Thank you for believing in me now 'Cause I do need it" |
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