| Brandi Carlile – That Year Lyrics | 15 years ago |
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This song is the reason I made an account on this website. I think that what Brandi Carlile does with this song is so amazing, so powerful... she should go down in the record books for this one. It is a story of love, loss, guilt, anger, and forgiveness. Brandi alludes in her lines that her group of friends distances themselves from the lonely character the year of his/her suicide. "There was a sharp turn and a sunburn / i was too cool for highschool that year". A sharp turn in their relationship; perhaps while Brandi makes time for more fun events with her friends like spending time in the sun, at the beach, etc. Things become bad for our character shortly after. Lonely and outcast, he/she suffers the horrible feeling of exclusion during a new years party that Brandi was invited too. "Must have been New Years / No one invited you/ you took things too far but i/ missed you and your antics/ you were lonesome and / blue eyed and / so special to us". Brandi suffers from the guilt of acting like a shallow teenager (the way that teenagers are supposed to act) and not allowing herself to be seen with her friend at this event. The use of the word 'antics' automatically implants an image of strange and abnormal behavior; this is a subtle technique used by songwriters to indirectly paint a picture. The resulting suicide ("you took things too far") haunted her for years. The next few verses are mostly self explanatory. She sings that her friend should have taken a break from life to figure out their problems with depression instead of resorting to suicide. Brandi implies with her normative statement "You should have taken a long break instead of a / high drop from a tall place" that our character's actions were completely selfish. Brandi's anger prevents her from speaking her friends name for ten years. The climax of the song is her acceptance of her friends fate, and her forgiveness of his/her actions. She has a disagreement after our character's suicide with one of their mutual friends. "Said he forgave you / I said I hated you". She is making amends with her dead friend by saying, "He was the bigger man / I was sixteen". She knows she made a mistake being angry with him/her for so long. "All the innocence it took for / you to finally make your year book that year." Suicide is a good story to draw sympathy in a high school year book, but Brandi alludes that the cost ('all the innocence') of her friend was too great. The last line is her final apology to her friend for being so rigid in her decision to be angry. "I was angry / I was a baptist / I was a daughter / I was wrong." Her feelings of anger were drawn from her belief that her friend's actions were selfish and unwarranted. By referring to herself as a baptist, she further explains her reasoning for being angry, as suicide is forbidden in Christianity (one goes to hell if they commit suicide). "I was a daughter" is her way of explaining her inability to look past her religion and forgive her friend. Most likely her father is a devout Christian and harshly impressed his beliefs upon our songwriter. And the ultimate apology comes at the end with her admission of guilt, "I was wrong." This song is absolutely beautiful. Brandi Carlile's voice has the ability to paint such beautiful scenery, despite the bleak and depressing narrative. It conjures feelings of peace, harmony, and happiness. I am captivated by this artist. |
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