| A Fine Frenzy – Near To You Lyrics | 14 years ago |
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I also feel the need to vomit out my life story, so here goes... Line by line... He and I had something beautiful But so dysfunctional it couldn't last My ex (let's call him Edward and keep with the New Moon theme) had a beautiful, wonderful, amazing relationship. He wrote songs for me, he stayed up with me when I was feeling bad, we had light saber fights... I could go on. But it was great. There was a lot of trust there and I put a lot, emotionally, into that relationship. Then we broke up. He has problems with depression and he doesn't have a great home life, and that took it's toll on what we had. I'd tell him to move out of his parent's house- go to a friends, find a cheap apartment- anything. But he wouldn't, and that caused a lot of tension between us. It couldn't last. I loved him so but I let him go Because I knew he'd never love me back I did love him- I still do. For the first time in my life, I thought I was going to marry him. He was everything I'd ever wanted, and everything I could have asked for. I thought maybe, initially, we'd get back together. But when it became clear that fighting the breakup would lead to nothing but more arguing, I just... stopped. I let him go. Such pain as this shouldn't have to be experienced I'm still reeling from the loss, still a little bit delirious I am still getting over Edward. I have my good days and my bad days and my in-between days, where I wish I could call him and we could just talk- about anything. Sometimes I think "well, maybe he WILL come back and we can start over", but I know truthfully that that's wishful thinking. Near to you I am healing but it's taking so long Though he's gone and you are wonderful, it's hard to move on Yet I'm better near to you "You" in this context is one of my friends; let's call him Jacob. He's listened to me at my very worst- either so depressed that I'd be nearing drastic action, or so incredibly mad that I'd be ready to beat Edward to a pulp, if only he were around. He's always listened to me. Edward left at one of the worst times in my life. A family friend had just passed away from cancer, and then a friend of mine from school had just committed suicide. When Edward and I broke up, I literally felt like I had nowhere and no one to turn to. But Jacob was there. Even though I'm sure I sounded like a whiny 13-year-old most of the time, he always listened. And because of that, I started healing. Even though I know Edward is not coming back, and Jacob is great, it is hard. But I'm better when I'm talking to Jacob. You and I have something different And I'm enjoying it cautiously Jacob and I have a very different relationship than the ones I'm used to. Edward was the guy that I usually fall for: musical, a little hyperactive, and if I'm totally honest, someone who needed fixing. Yes, I'm one of those people who falls for broken people. But Jacob is different. He's very calm and collected at all times. He doesn't have a musical bone in his body. But he's normal. By that I mean he doesn't need fixing. Rather, he's the one fixing me. And I like it. I do have feelings for him, and I like that, but I don't want to hurt him or myself while I'm still getting over Edward. So I'm enjoying it... cautiously. I'm battle scarred, I am working oh so hard To get back to who I used to be When I met Jacob at college, he met the happy me. The one who was excited to start school. The one who had an incredible boyfriend who I loved. The one who hadn't experienced death, more death, heartbreak, and even more death in one summer. But now I've been broken and I'm trying to put myself back together. The last two weeks have been incredible; there's been a lot of healing going on, but I'm still not quite whole again. He's disappearing, fading, steadily When I'm so close to being yours, won't you stay with me? Please... Edward is slowly fading from my life. When we first broke up, it was like I couldn't go two seconds without thinking of something that reminded me of him. But now those are less frequent, and I don't feel the need to go cry when I do. I do feel like I'm close to being Jacob's. As I said before, I have feelings for him, and I don't know for sure, but I think he does too. But for now, I cling to his friendship, and hope that maybe, someday, in the future (Ingrid Michaelson reference!!) we can have a relationship. I only know that I am better where you are I only know that I belong where you are This part is kind of unique to my situation. I met Jacob, as I mentioned before, at school. My school is 200 miles away from my hometown, 200 miles away from Edward. One of the only things I know for sure now is that I belong at school, that I'm better at school. Pretty much ever since we've broken up, I've been counting the days until I go back. Today there are four. I know that I have friends there who are always there for me, and I know that I'll be better there. That's my story. Wow, that's a lot of typing. |
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| Demi Lovato – Here We Go Again Lyrics | 15 years ago |
| I relate to this... I really liked this guy and really put myself on a roller coaster, hating him, then wanting to be with him. I finally got over it, but it's (for me, at least) about knowing somebody's hurt you before and they'll probably do it again, but you can't bear to see them out of your life. | |
| Demi Lovato – Catch Me Lyrics | 15 years ago |
| I read somewhere that she wrote this in Colleyville (her hometown) before she was famous. If that's true, GOOOO DEMI! She would have been maybe 13 or 14 when she wrote it. WOW! :D | |
| Taylor Swift – I'd Lie Lyrics | 15 years ago |
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I could tell you His favorite color's blue He likes to argue Born the 10th day of '92 His sister's beautiful He has his father's eyes And when he asks me if I love him... I can't lie. I'm re-writing this song for my boyfriend. :) |
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| Taylor Swift – Forever and Always (Piano Version) Lyrics | 15 years ago |
| I remember when my most recent ex broke up with me. The song I listened to was "Breathe", also by Taylor Swift, but then I found out I'd been lied to and the relationship really meant nothing. That was when I started listening to "Forever and Always" because I was so angry that I'd been fooled again, going along with the capitalized letters in the album "WHEN YOU PLAY THESE GAMES WE'RE BOTH GOING TO LOSE". A few months passed, and I got over it. Then, when I first heard the piano version, it brought back all the betrayal and the sadness that I hadn't really had a chance to let myself feel before. I was always mad that I'd been lied to, but I never was sad about it. The piano version is a perfect reflection of the progression of a breakup, from the anger to the sadness, and, although I hate to admit it, "I STILL MISS WHO I THOUGHT HE WAS". | |
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