The other night, my grandfather died, my fathers dad. I've not been taking it to well, My grandparents on my fathers side have always been a huge part of my life as we have lived with them numerous times. I wanna go home to be with everyone, thing is, I can't. I mean I could buy a plane ticket and go there, but when I tried to come back into England they wouldn't let me because the next time I leave the country, I HAVE to change my visa status, to either Spusal, or Fiance. . If we were to go back to be with my family, we'd have to do fiance, even tho we are getting married in 4 weeks. and if we do a fiance visa, there is a big chance that they will deny me, because even though rich and I are very much in love, there is still always age that people will take into factor. . If we are already married, theres a law that says you can appeal what immigration officals say because that cant deny a married couple to live together cus its our right to be together...... SO needless to say, I can't go be with my family, I have all of this stuff bout immigration going thru my head, and scared shitless that theyre going to deny me and i wont be able to be with rich... and my grampa is dead, which to me is the saddest thing in the world, I wish i got to say bye, or have seen him more resently, i havent been home since b4 christmas... blah. its kinda lonely here, thankfully rich is so supportive and helpful, he even took the day i found out bout grampa off of work,, then its saturday, then sunday, and hes talking bout taking monday off as well to be with me. Well,, Me and krystle, only resently fell out, but since grampa died, I had to call her to let her know as she is close with all of my family, and so, we are kinda friends, I think that we are just the kinda friends who will be there for eachother when needed,, but not the type of friends who hang out just for fun. We just would always be there for eachother, no matter what happens, so I guess that doesnt exactly equal - not friends... lol