any personal transition or disaster is ruthlessly associated with different lyrics, melodies, hooks. My musical past and present are merging and steering this culturally stigmatized debut of my 5th decade as a woman.. I'm on the threshold of revelation just about all the time, or so it would seem. it's the juicy hormones of female fertility gearing down and wreaking havoc on my brain and emotions. thoughts on growing old are suddenly populating my mind. senile dementia: must be a sort of 'reward' for having navigated the vagaries of being female, and casting that long glance back at potential never mined, time spent on psychedelics, desperate attempts to assign meaning and depth to escape and ennui. can you tell that i've been listening to 'the shins' and to 'hunky dory' an AWFUL lot? I bounce from the music that informed my teens to techno, dubstep, indie. music isn't ageist. it's been my constant evolver and anchor to sanity in a life lived, as i see it tonight at least, way too SMALL. I make money from my skill at connecting with men, holding space with them, slowing down their arousal and giving them a moment's release. maybe a few new senses to engage whether they walk 'round the block, sit in an airport for hours, stare at their monitors mindlessly, or greet their wife of 30+ years. and music informs these sessions too--it's sensual and ambient. the dreamlike mixes pace my sessions- providing me with a protective sort of veil- insofar as i have an intimate 'ship with the music used to underscore the session. it's crucial to stay sensual yet COMPASSIONATE. not letting the client take advantage of you. it's the age old sex worker persona. back to the music... the moment the gentleman is out the door, part of the purging of the treatment room is to blast music that i'm passionate about. whether it's some vintage SF house music from 1991, or Television, Bowie, The Strokes, The Shins, etc. i am so sensitive to music that sometimes i shun it. i can't stand to hear a note of it because it swallows me whole. totally swirls me, claims me, unzips me .
any personal transition or disaster is ruthlessly associated with different lyrics, melodies, hooks. My musical past and present are merging and steering this culturally stigmatized debut of my 5th decade as a woman.. I'm on the threshold of revelation just about all the time, or so it would seem. it's the juicy hormones of female fertility gearing down and wreaking havoc on my brain and emotions. thoughts on growing old are suddenly populating my mind. senile dementia: must be a sort of 'reward' for having navigated the vagaries of being female, and casting that long glance back at potential never mined, time spent on psychedelics, desperate attempts to assign meaning and depth to escape and ennui. can you tell that i've been listening to 'the shins' and to 'hunky dory' an AWFUL lot? I bounce from the music that informed my teens to techno, dubstep, indie. music isn't ageist. it's been my constant evolver and anchor to sanity in a life lived, as i see it tonight at least, way too SMALL. I make money from my skill at connecting with men, holding space with them, slowing down their arousal and giving them a moment's release. maybe a few new senses to engage whether they walk 'round the block, sit in an airport for hours, stare at their monitors mindlessly, or greet their wife of 30+ years. and music informs these sessions too--it's sensual and ambient. the dreamlike mixes pace my sessions- providing me with a protective sort of veil- insofar as i have an intimate 'ship with the music used to underscore the session. it's crucial to stay sensual yet COMPASSIONATE. not letting the client take advantage of you. it's the age old sex worker persona. back to the music... the moment the gentleman is out the door, part of the purging of the treatment room is to blast music that i'm passionate about. whether it's some vintage SF house music from 1991, or Television, Bowie, The Strokes, The Shins, etc. i am so sensitive to music that sometimes i shun it. i can't stand to hear a note of it because it swallows me whole. totally swirls me, claims me, unzips me .