Today is going pretty well im in a good mood for some strange reason I really don’t know why im so happy. O well. I need a life tho like really bad im addicted to runescape. Ha see I told you need a life but I don’t care at least I don’t play wow. Wow is for geeks and im not a geek im a dork lol. I hate the way that life is set up. Don’t you it sucks so badly. A car hit me the other day. I was on the cross walk too that the fucked up part. But im not complaining I dented their car pretty badly by kicking it so I win. When I fight I fight by kicking. I am an artist and I a cook I don’t wanna ruin my hands fighting I use my arms to block so its all good. I don’t like to fight to solve stuff I like to argue tho idk why I just do its fun. I win some and I lose some but its still fun some times I argue just for the fun of it. People find me as odd and strange but idc I am me and no one can change that cuz I see me as a perfectly fine person even tho I do stupid stuff that don’t make me a stupid person.

this is the best poem ever Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary, Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore, While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping, As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door. "'Tis some visitor," I muttered, "tapping at my chamber door- Only this, and nothing more." Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December, And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor. Eagerly I wished the morrow;- vainly I had sought to borrow From my books surcease of sorrow- sorrow for the lost Lenore- For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore- Nameless here for evermore. And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each purple curtain Thrilled me- filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before; So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating, "'Tis some visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door- Some late visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door;- This it is, and nothing more." Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer, "Sir," said I, "or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore; But the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping, And so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door, That I scarce was sure I heard you"- here I opened wide the door;- Darkness there, and nothing more. Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing, Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortals ever dared to dream before; But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token, And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, "Lenore!" This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, "Lenore!"- Merely this, and nothing more. Back into the chamber turning, all my soul within me burning, Soon again I heard a tapping somewhat louder than before. "Surely," said I, "surely that is something at my window lattice: Let me see, then, what thereat is, and this mystery explore- Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore;- 'Tis the wind and nothing more." Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter, In there stepped a stately raven of the saintly days of yore; Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he; But, with mien of lord or lady, perched above my chamber door- Perched upon a bust of Pallas just above my chamber door- Perched, and sat, and nothing more. Then this ebony bird beguiling my sad fancy into smiling, By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore. "Though thy crest be shorn and shaven, thou," I said, "art sure no craven, Ghastly grim and ancient raven wandering from the Nightly shore- Tell me what thy lordly name is on the Night's Plutonian shore!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore." Much I marvelled this ungainly fowl to hear discourse so plainly, Though its answer little meaning- little relevancy bore; For we cannot help agreeing that no living human being Ever yet was blest with seeing bird above his chamber door- Bird or beast upon the sculptured bust above his chamber door, With such name as "Nevermore." But the raven, sitting lonely on the placid bust, spoke only That one word, as if his soul in that one word he did outpour. Nothing further then he uttered- not a feather then he fluttered- Till I scarcely more than muttered, "other friends have flown before- On the morrow he will leave me, as my hopes have flown before." Then the bird said, "Nevermore." Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken, "Doubtless," said I, "what it utters is its only stock and store, Caught from some unhappy master whom unmerciful Disaster Followed fast and followed faster till his songs one burden bore- Till the dirges of his Hope that melancholy burden bore Of 'Never- nevermore'." But the Raven still beguiling all my fancy into smiling, Straight I wheeled a cushioned seat in front of bird, and bust and door; Then upon the velvet sinking, I betook myself to linking Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous bird of yore- What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt and ominous bird of yore Meant in croaking "Nevermore." This I sat engaged in guessing, but no syllable expressing To the fowl whose fiery eyes now burned into my bosom's core; This and more I sat divining, with my head at ease reclining On the cushion's velvet lining that the lamplight gloated o'er, But whose velvet violet lining with the lamplight gloating o'er, She shall press, ah, nevermore! Then methought the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer Swung by Seraphim whose footfalls tinkled on the tufted floor. "Wretch," I cried, "thy God hath lent thee- by these angels he hath sent thee Respite- respite and nepenthe, from thy memories of Lenore! Quaff, oh quaff this kind nepenthe and forget this lost Lenore!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore." "Prophet!" said I, "thing of evil!- prophet still, if bird or devil!- Whether Tempter sent, or whether tempest tossed thee here ashore, Desolate yet all undaunted, on this desert land enchanted- On this home by horror haunted- tell me truly, I implore- Is there- is there balm in Gilead?- tell me- tell me, I implore!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore." "Prophet!" said I, "thing of evil- prophet still, if bird or devil! By that Heaven that bends above us- by that God we both adore- Tell this soul with sorrow laden if, within the distant Aidenn, It shall clasp a sainted maiden whom the angels name Lenore- Clasp a rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore." Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore." "Be that word our sign in parting, bird or fiend," I shrieked, upstarting- "Get thee back into the tempest and the Night's Plutonian shore! Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken! Leave my loneliness unbroken!- quit the bust above my door! Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!" Quoth the Raven, "Nevermore." And the Raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting On the pallid bust of Pallas just above my chamber door; And his eyes have all the seeming of a demon's that is dreaming, And the lamplight o'er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor; And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor Shall be lifted- nevermore!

The school im in is full of weirdoes. Always causing drama always fighting. I mean we are only here for 4 hours and they can’t get along for 4 hours. FOUR HOURS. It’s unbelievable. I cant stand how stupid they are either I feel like the smartest one here sometimes its annoying. I wish I went to a normal high school again. GOD IM HUNGRY I want some pizza ya a supreme pizza with peppers and pepperoni and cheese and onions and bacon…. god this isn’t helping lol. I need a life and some friends I have like no friends I need friends. I cant get a girl either it makes me mad. I guess im to weird. But o well I miss my sister. A lot but nothing will change o well my life is slowly going down the drain. Its getting worse and worse as I get older I hope when im 18 things will get better. But until then ill just have to put up with all the shit life throws at me. I guess I keep ranting on and on and on don’t I. Well im sorry I just have a lot of shit on my mind and I need a cigarette really badly. Well that’s all for now please if you read this please leave a comment that would be greatly appreciated. Thanks good bye.

today pretty much sucked.it was horible.it was to cold then it was to hot now its raining.i swear the weather here in ohio is so fucked up its unbelieveable.i thinks mother nature is on crack right now.i swear i hate the weather but with out it we couldnt figure out what to talk about.plus it gives me something to complain about since i like to complain.i love complaining for some strange reason its so weird and everyone complains about it but o well. everyone complains about everything i do just cuz im always there.plus being an only child your an easy target for your parents to. well thats all for now dueces

to me this is like an argument that me and my mom are having Child: I'll be coming home just to be alone 'Cause I know you're not there and I know that you don't care I can hardly wait to leave this place Parent: No matter how hard I try You're never satisfied Child: This is not a home I think I'm better off alone Parent: You always disappear Even when you're here Child: this is not my home I think I'm better off alone home. Home. This house is not a Home. Home. This house is not a home. Child: By the time you come home, I'm already stoned You turn off the TV and you scream at me I can hardly wait 'til you get off my case Parent: No matter how hard I try You're never satisfied Child: This is not a home I think I'm better off alone Parent: You always disappear Even when you're here Child: This is not my home I think I'm better off alone home. Home. This house is not a Home. Home. This house is not a Home. Home. This house is not a home. Child: I'M BETTER OFF ALONE! Parent: No matter how hard I try you're never satisfied Child: This is not a home I think I'm better off alone Parent: You always disappear Even when you're here Child: This is not my home I think I'm better off alone home. Home. This house is not a Home. Home. This house is not a Home. Home. This house is not a Home. Home. This house is not a home.

when you read my journals can yu please leave a reply it would be very nice if you did

hey im yzark love to read and hiking in cascade park. lorain is boring. and i have no freedom. im bi sexual.yes i am goth and yes i am emo but i love to rock and if you like hardcore rock heavy metal, alternative rock, goth metal, and cats(random i know) then we are going to be best friends.

Dont you hate all the things you have to put up with in life? i do. i hate the fact that i have to go to school every month. why? you ask? cuz im only in school for 4 hours a day i still get breaks though.i hate how i cant see most of my friends with out parental transportation. parents are always complaining they dont have enough gas money. gas prices should go down for the benfit of the country.i hate how you have to do every thing your superiors tell you. its so stupid its like i have a life to you know. but of course they dont care about what you say cuz they figure they are above you so you have to please them and help them with their problems. bull shit. a teen's life is rough these days and all adults tell us to do about it is DEAL WITH IT or TO BAD IT AINT GOING TO CHANGE. adults are so negative and they wonder why the newer generations are so negative its cuz thats what they see from all the older people. i hate how parents blame your existance for their problems. hey its not like we had a say in whether we should be born or not now did we. no we didnt. i hate how people get shot up in the street for looking at some one. thats just retarded. its a look DEAL WITH IT. its not like they are talking shit about you to your face. people today are so trigger happy and a gun doesnt make you a man unless you are on a war ground fighting for your country. fist to fist is more manly then guns. anyone can pull a trigger. but it takes guts to actually stand up and fight some one. think about. and people need to stop degrating eachother its not cool. i mean come on you wouldnt want people doing it to you so why do it to them. and before you beat some one up for roastin your ass or some other dumb shit keep this in mind "haters inspire me to keep doin what im doin and making what im doin better" the best revenge is success remember that. well im out peace blog ya later.

i dedicate the song time of dying by three days grace to my 13 year old sister. this song would probly explain what she was thinking because first she was on the ground nearly dead then we took heer to the hospital and she was in a coma.........she died march 11 T^T i feel this is the song she would be singing to me if she could

i think music is what truely makes the world go round. music is how you can express your self. it helps me calm down or have something to talk about. it also helps inspire me when im writing my poems, drawing or writing song to play on my guitar. i love music so much i begged my dad for my guitar and i named it socrates. i like that name lol. well thats all for now comment my journals plz thanks bye.