He left with a quick "I love you". "I'll be back in a half hour." He never got the kiss I sent him. But oh well. He wouldn't be gone long. I was so wrong. We'd never been apart for over a day. I should have thought of something to make him stay. Now he's locked in a cell. I'm lying on the floor with a mouth full of pills so I don't cry anymore. I fucking miss you. I'm nothing without you. You told me you'd be back so soon, I didn't bother telling you everything you mean just in case you're gone for the longest 30 minutes of my life. Living without you is more like dying. I can't seem to stop my crying. I've always hid it, but for this I can't. The pain's too strong to even pretend. I'm not okay. I never will be until you're home to comfort me. No one can replace what you do. I guess I really can't live without you. I fucking miss you. I'm nothing without you. You told me you'd be back so soon, I didn't bother telling you everything you mean just in case you're gone for the longest 30 minutes of my life. You rescued me from myself, but now I'm stuck alone with the enemy. I fight it for you, but I'm losing strength with no one to save me. I fucking miss you. I'm nothing without you. You told me you'd be back so soon, I didn't bother telling you everything you mean just in case you're gone for the longest 30 minutes of my life.

I've lost myself again. I feel the darkness coming in. I can't see what's up ahead. But the darkest place is inside my own head. It shined so perfect for a while, but now I don't know how to find my way. I'm running to an unknown destination. I don't know where it is, but it's gotta beat staying here. I'm drowning in my thoughts I once could control. I wish I could find my way home. How did I get back here? My vision was so clear. I had it all. But now it's disappeared. My heart beats for the first time. I feel like he's not all mine. I keep tugging, but I'm the weakest in this war. I'm running to an unknown destination. I don't know where it is, but it's gotta beat staying here. I'm drowning in my thoughts I once could control. I wish I could find my way home. I try to escape, but every time I fail. Every turn I take brings me farther away. I'm running to an unknown destination. I don't know where it is, but it's gotta beat staying here. I'm drowning in my thoughts I once could control. I wish I could find my way home.

(Funny fact-I'm now best friends with the girl I wrote this song about, and still dating the guy I am speaking to in this song...lol) She walks down the crowded streets, glaring with eyes that can incinerate your soul. Snarls reveal her teeth, rotten from the lies she coughs up. She chases me, wanting to draw my blood. I'll show my heart like a cross. She'll never bite my neck. I'll make it home to find you alone in bed. She is unveiled now. Remember when I said I'd be with you until I was dead? And that still applies in the dark and in the light. Don't worry, dear. You have my hand whether I'm far or near. She can't change my mind. Not now or any time. Her voice is alluring to the unsuspecting. She calls for you. But you know better. I'm feeling weaker. We can't keep hiding like we've been. I'm not giving up. I will end this somehow. Remember when I said I'd be with you until I was dead? And that still applies in the dark and in the light. Don't worry, dear. You have my hand whether I'm far or near. She can't change my mind. Not now or any time. I break, I cannot take this. She smells the blood on my wrists. I feel her tip my head back. And her fangs touch my skin. I drive the wooden stake straight through her chest. Remember when I said I'd be with you until I was dead? And that still applies in the dark and in the light. Don't worry, dear. You have my hand whether I'm far or near. She can't change my mind. Not now or any time.

Please don't do this to yourself. I've seen the pain that it causes. You don't need me like you think you do because I don't need you anymore. We tried and it couldn't work. Don't ruin this, you're the greatest friend. What are you trying to do? You have my mind spinning, spinning. When I wanted you, you didn't take me. Now when I'm in love, you're drowning in jealousy. Please just move on before it is too late. I cannot be part of your fate. You say you're over it. So why envy him? If you're really over us, just be happy that I am. You didn't lose me. We just had to step back. When I wanted you, you didn't take me. Now when I'm in love, you're drowning in jealousy. Please just move on before it is too late. I cannot be part of your fate. How can you try to take away my happiness? You should be smiling with me. Was it too much to expect? What are you acting like this? You had your chance. When I wanted you, you didn't take me. Now when I'm in love, you're drowning in jealousy. Please just move on before it is too late. I cannot be part of your fate.

I was trembling in the closet, my hand pinned to my mouth, desperately attempting not to make a sound. I knew how it would end if you ever found me. I bit my tongue until it bled, I gasped in pain, bit it again. You obviously heard me. I see the doorknob turn. You enter, grab my arm, and drag me to your car. Then you say "No, don't fear. I am here to take you away. Forget the things you used to love and replace them with me. Take this blade and open your chest, pull out your heart and hand it here. I will hold it close to me. This is the fate that you deserve." I did what you said, afraid to refuse. It didn't hurt like you'd expect. The blood made my burning skin cool. "Why do you want me dead?" You tell me "This is love." "Look in your pocket," you said. I pull out your heart. You pull over next to a cemetery gate. We step out and you show me the graves, the stones are engraved with familiar names. We dance and celebrate this death. I stop, my smile fades in horror. "Is this really how it works?" You grab my hand and say "No, don't fear. I am here to take you away. Forget the things you used to love and replace them with me. Take this blade and open your chest, pull out your heart and hand it here. I will hold it close to me. This is the fate that you deserve." I thought this would be torture, but my fear is gone. Tell me to bleed, I will again, a thousand times until there's no blood left. Even though my body feels dead, my heart came alive when you said "No, don't fear. I am here to take you away. Forget the things you used to love and replace them with me. Take this blade and open your chest, pull out your heart and hand it here. I will hold it close to me. This is the fate that you deserve."

I hate how everyone assumes they know everything about me. You don't know 99 percent of what I am feeling. I'm a master of disguise. You can't see through my eyese. You'll never know me. My life's a one-man masquerade. You don't know my real face. I don't just remove my mask for anyone. Isn't my smile so pretty? It alone could take on the world. But underneathe that, you can't see that I'm screaming. Alone with no where to go. If you knew everything that I'm thinking, maybe then you'd see. I can't be everything that you want. First I need to locate me. You think that I'm all better, but it's just a show. I've just improved at hiding everything I don't want you to know. My confident attitude is just part of the costume. Everyday is Halloween for me. You don't have the slightest clue. Oh no! What should we do? I don't care. You can't help me. Isn't my smile so pretty? It alone could take on the world. But underneathe that, you can't see that I'm screaming. Alone with no where to go. If you knew everything that I'm thinking, maybe then you'd see. I can't be everything that you want. First I need to locate me. You're so shallow, rough and hollow. You know how fucked up I was. That all can't just disappear. I'm an actor not a magician. Isn't my smile so pretty? It alone could take on the world. But underneathe that, you can't see that I'm screaming. Alone with no where to go. If you knew everything that I'm thinking, maybe then you'd see. I can't be everything that you want. First I need to locate me.

(I wrote this a couple years ago, so maybe it's horrible. Idk lol) The clock seems to be frozen. How is it not light out yet? I need to close my eyes, but I'm not tired. The only sound is tick, tick, tick. I feel my heart pound faster, then a waterfall from my eyes. I don't care, hopefully the current's strong so it can wash away my life. What happened? What made you hide? You stabbed me and I died. I told you it'll be alright. I don't want revenge. I just want my life. We made a beautiful hollywood film, but you killed the ending. It's not too late to fix it. There's always editing. Maybe if we change the part where he leaves her behind. Instead he could kiss her, say exactly what's on his mind. What happened? What made you hide? You stabbed me and I died. I told you it'll be alright. I don't want revenge. I just want my life. 2AM, I'm still waiting for sun. It's been a damn long year since you decided to run. This picture doesn't make sense with all the faded spots. Why'd you erase yourself and ruin the art? What happened? What made you hide? You stabbed me and I died. I told you it'll be alright. I don't want revenge. I just want my life.

I miss us being one. Once so close, but now so far apart. I can't remember the last time I looked into your eyes and could be proud I had you. All things must come to an end. I'm at my worst cause you're not here. I've never felt so insecure with everything I used to know so well. My emptiness will not subside. I'm missing out on what should be my happiness in my life. We grew apart, never being able to agree on what to do or where to go. You left me here all alone to slowly die. I'm at my worst cause you're not here. I've never felt so insecure with everything I used to know so well. My emptiness will not subside. I'm missing out on what should be my happiness in my life. I'm at my worst cause you're not here. I've never felt so insecure with everything I used to know so well. My emptiness will not subside. I'm missing out on what should be my happiness in my life. I'm begging you on hands and knees. "Please come back. Come rescue me." I am nothing without you. I'm at my worst cause you're not here. I've never felt so insecure with everything I used to know so well. My emptiness will not subside. I'm missing out on what should be my happiness in my life. I'm at my worst cause you're not here. I've never felt so insecure with everything I used to know so well. My emptiness will not subside. I'm missing out on what should be my happiness in my life.

(By the way, feel free to try to interpret my lyrics if you're really bored lol.) When you sleep, the graveyard comes alive. The bodies dance in the moonlight, following the sound of your beating heart. To your window, they will march. Climb up in, look around, smell your flesh, pull the blankets down. You hear the noise, and as you open your eyes, it's far too late. They're eating your insides. We can't escape these demons. Every move we make, they see. They won't stop for anything until the whole world has passed away. We can't speak our own minds. They will hear and go after your voice. They have no heart, but that's a choice. They starve for your precious life. Tearing apart two much in love. They want your brain. They want your blood. We can't escape these demons. Every move we make, they see. They won't stop for anything until the whole world has passed away. We can't escape these demons. Every move we make, they see. They won't stop for anything until the whole world has passed away. So bring out the army. To rid us of the dead. It's too late, they already have been taken.

I think my journal shall be used to post my own lyrics. I wrote this song for my fiance the night that he died. I sent it to him on facebook after he said he was going to sleep. I thought he could read it when he woke up. I knew he was dying, but I didn't expect it to be that night. He lived about 6 hours away from me, and was going to move in with me 2 weeks from the day I wrote this. There is also a music video for this song on Youtube, if you want to hear it. You could search "The Flood" but that will probably give you thousands of results, so it would probably be easier to search for me, and then go to it from my profile. My username is rainbowsherbertstar. (I costar in a Youtube series called Rainbow Sherbert... lol) This new release of chemicals creates a rainstorm in my head. Overwhelming and beautiful, I wish it never had to end. But it's always raining somewhere. It never goes away. I'll love you forever, even if I die today. Even if I die today. Today, the rain leaked out. For the first time, it overflowed. I wasn't scared to say that my heart was on overload. And that's okay because it's holding the greatest thing I will ever see. It grows and it never bleeds. It grows and it never bleeds. Look what you do to me. I close my eyes so you can lay next to me. We are so far away, but my mind forces you to stay. You interested me from the start. Are you glad I dug in deep to find the scars? I had to break the wall you built around yourself to really hold onto you. You can't say it didn't help. You can't say it didn't help. Look what you do to me. I close my eyes so you can lay next to me. We are so far away, but my mind forces you to stay. Two more weeks until the storm becomes stronger. I've never been so impatient for weather. Let's drown in the flood. Two more weeks until the storm becomes stronger. I've never been so impatient for weather. Let's drown in the flood. Let's drown in the flood. Look what you do to me. I close my eyes so you can lay next to me. We are so far away, but my mind forces you to stay. Two more weeks until the storm becomes stronger. I've never been so impatient for weather. Let's drown in the flood.