i didn't come here for weeks thinking i would find a comment attached to my previous post and i did. i don't want hurt anyone. i treat this journal, as a place where i can let go off all the things bottling inside me. that's why i say sorry for offending you, if i do.

So life right now is not so good. It's been 6 months since i wasn't a student anymore, haven't become a worker. now i am just a nobody. My boyfriend hasn't been treating me good. I think he hates being with me. And i cry from the loneliness. oh the pain is giving me a recurring headache. I don't know where it came from, I don't usually get headaches but lately one has settled on my forehead, and comes more often than not. My heart definitely hurts, feels like it's being gently pushed in from all sides, it's not a sharp pain, but a pressure in my chest. 

If i died right now i honestly  would not care. I just hope the ones who love me forget about me when it happens. I think i have found my meaning of life. It is to live for others, nothing else. To comfort others, to help others, to do pointless things like play games all day. Oh so depressive.

ps. i feel like i'm getting dumber by the day, i haven't excerised my brain is so long